- AfIqAh^^AiSyAh -

Road to happiness.

2012-02-02T08:07:00.000+09:00

I was totally moved by the story line. I could feel the pain, the sadness, the determination and every other emotions that the writer tries to convey to her readers. It was such a gripping story that I couldn't fake my feelings. It was just five minutes ago I finished reading this book and it was also five minutes ago that my eyes were uncharacteristically being a bit watery. Weird...

Every time I hold on to a good book, it is difficult for me to put it down. It is almost impossible for me to even realise what is happening around me when my mind is brought to this 'other world'. My sleeping time even went haywire these past couple of days due to my eagerness to finish up the story. That's just me. My bad habit everytime I have a good book in my hands. I will continue reading until my eye lids get really heavy. Until the words become unreadable and make no sense anymore. Only then I will surrender, stretch my hand on the switch and reluctantly turn off the lights. And just within seconds I will be in dream land.

Well, of course this book which I read is just a fiction, but the message that Jojo Moyes, the writer, wants to convey is so clear(as far as I can see). 'Me Before You' is actually a simple story about 2 people with different angles of life. A disabled guy who has been spending his life on a wheelchair after a terrible accident really wants to die as he can't accept his new fate, and a young girl who doesn't explore the meaning of life that much, works for this guy after she lost her old job.The story starts with the girl being determined to convince this guy to keep on living as there are much more to life than just complaining how bad things are. However, it turns out that somehow this guy has changed this girl's life by encouraging her to try more things out there and be fearless.

Okay, enough with the details. Until you read the book yourself you will understand what I mean.

The only part which I don't like in this book is about suicide. It is not our job to take our own lives. Leave that to Allah. He is the almighty and He knows what's best for us. Allah never burdens a soul more than it can bear. Well, I just hope I will never come across with someone who wants to kill him or herself. Nauzibillah... Even if I do, I hope I can somehow persuade these people to live and show them the real path.

It somehow makes me think, to what extend has my life made an impact on anyone? Have I directly or indirectly encouraged someone unknowingly in leading a better life? Once I am gone from this world, what kind of things will I be remembered of? *scary thoughts* I just hope I haven't given any bad influence on other people though. It is my secret wish (not a secret anymore) that everyone knows what the real meaning of life is. And also to appreciate the life more.

Happiness can't be measured by the money and asset you have. Some people have the money, but they are not happy. Being blessed doesn't mean you are showered by wealth and fame. To me, being blessed is to be contented with the little things we have in life. To be satisfied that we are able to still breathe and see the beauty of God's creation. Even to be able to wake up in the morning and continue living is a great thing that we have to be grateful of. Being grateful is just the way to happiness.

Remember, once we set our intentions straight that everything we do is for Allah, everything will be made easy for us. InsyaAllah.

From the smallest to the biggest thing, Allah makes it perfectly. Well balanced. MasyaAllah! :)

Alamak, dah termelalut pulak... Camni la bila baca buku macam2.. Isk... Goodnight! :D

Respect others first if you want to gain respect

2012-01-05T11:36:00.001+09:00

You don't have to own a newspaper company. You don't have to be a radio deejay. You don't have to go all out to spread some news. Petty news especially. Just click log in, and go into your twitter or facebook account. Tell the world and spread the juicy gossips you might think of. Even 'better' if you have some eye-catching pictures to support your stories.

How lame can people nowadays be?

I am quite sure we are busy with our own lives, (that what we ALWAYS say to other people : busy busy busy, not enough time etc) but how come people still manage to butt in other people's business? Especially the bad ones. Just look at ourselves. Are we good enough, are we perfect enough to talk bad about other people? Shouldn't we feel ashamed of talking about other people, especially about people whom we are not even connected to. Whom we haven't even spoken or met face to face at all. Do not judge people from how they look. It just shows how shallow we are.

YEAH, SURE you may come from the same country and all, and feel like it is your duty to to tell off the people who you think have gone out of track. BUT!! There is a proper way in giving advice. Even in Islam we are taught to be pleasant. Be nice and think before we say something. Do not say anything unless we are sure of something because if we say something wrong, it can be categorised as FITNAH (defame). Be careful when we speak even when the news is true.

The Prophet (pbuh) defined backbiting when he said: "Do you know what is meant by backbiting?" They said, "Allah and His Messenger know best." He said, "To say something about your brother which he dislikes." One asked, "Even if what I say is true about my brother?" He replied, "If such defects you say are true about him, then you have backbitten him, and if he doesn't have what you say, then you have committed slander against him."

(Related by Muslim, Abu Dawood, and Tirmidhi)

Hence, it is not allowed to talk about somebody in his/her absence, even if what was narrated was true. If it was not true, then it would be a bigger sin and it is called Buhtan (false accusation).

source: http://www.islamawareness.net/Backbiting/backbiting.html

I am really disturbed to see the way people try to 'change' other people by giving advice by improper ways. What I mean by improper here is by condemning, saying nasty words and get angry. IF we really have the intention to give good advice, we should do the right way. Tell the people directly and NOT talk behind their back. That's the stupidest way ever, seriously. And if you don't have the opportunity to meet or drop some sincere advices to them, just pray for them. Do it the right way.

Remember, if we want to gain respect, we HAVE to start by respecting others.

I remember my trip to Amsterdam where I stopped by at a mosque for evening prayes. I wasn't sure the wudhu (ablution) place for ladies, so I randomly went into the toilet and wudhu place for men. My brother and sister-in-law were waiting for me outside just in case anyone (particularly men) wanted to enter. When I wanted to perform my wudhu, I heard some noise outside. Hurriedly I did what was necessary and stepped out. I saw a few guys were waiting outside and some of them (probably one or more) were half yelling because they wanted to use the room. Poor my sister-in-law trying to explain things to them. I am not quite sure whether they were talking in Dutch or Arabic or both (or neither) but I felt so disappointed as it was a mosque. A place where we perform our prayers and it is where we should be nice to each other.

Everybody makes mistakes, but try telling them in a good way. In a nicer way. Not by showing anger and yelling. If some non- Muslims enter the mosque and see such scenario, they will really get the wrong idea about Islam. How can we tell others that Islam is a religion of peace when we can't promote peace. *sigh*

So~~ people! Start your new year by being a better person. Only then, you will get the respect from others. This is a reminder for me as well.

Yesss, let's start by saying... I am.... going to be a better person. InsyaAllah! ;)

Tata 2011~

2011-12-31T05:52:00.000+09:00

Heyya~ It's almost 2012! Whoa! I am still reluctant to let this year pass. I have had so much fun and so many life turning experiences this year. This is also the year where I have met new amazing friends and I have been shifting from East to West. ^.^

Since I'm in a mood to reminisce, let me list the happenings from January up till December.

(WARNING: It might bore you to tears!)

January:

Abang Afiq and Syairah visited Japan (SoOo happy!!!)
Ayah received an email from Abang Nash (Alhamdulillah!! Can't say it enough)
Abang Nash and Kak Nora decided to come to Malaysia for Abang Afiq's wedding (Jumping with joy)

February:

Submitted my thesis (YEYYYY!!!)
Final year presentation went well!(Alhamdulillah!!! Soo relieved!!)
Got a digital photo frame from my batchmates since I was the only one to leave ES1 :')

March:

Japan was hit by the biggest earthquake + tsunami (heartbreaking T_T )
2nd visit to Korea. This time with Zzaaa (Burp)
Received bad news about the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear... (everyone back home was super worried and wanted me to go back earlier than planned. But, I refused)
Ayah and mummy came for my Graduation Day! (Yeehaaa~)
Went back to Malaysia with my parents. (*SOBS* Sayounara Nippon T_T)

April:

Holiday!!!! (Cuti-cuti Malaysia~~~)
Applied for practical
Applied for Postgrad course in the UK

May:

Recieved unconditional offer from Sheffield, Warwick, Queen Mary University (OVERJOYED!!)
Received offer from Manchester University for Nanoelectronics...
Started taking my driving class... (Yeah yeah, verrryy late, I know ;p)
Ayah's elevation for federal court (Alhamdulillah!!)
Started my practical at Istana Budaya!!!! :D

June:

Received unconditional offer from King's College London (decided to choose KCL over QMUL)
Abang Nash and Kak Nora arrived in KL!!
Preparing for Abang Afiq's wedding (Yey!! New dress!! Hehe)
Applied for student visa for the UK and it was accepted within 2 working days. (Alhamdulillah!!!)

July:

Abang Afiq got married to Kak Mass and everything went well, Alhamdulillah! (Welcome to the family Kak Mass!!!)
Practical students at IB organised a musical show and I was the only one from Technical Department. (Got the experience to connect the microphones myself.. Hehe)
Abang Nash and Kak Nora went back to Holland after a month in Malaysia :'((

August:

Had my driving test on the 2nd day of Ramadan. Fasting, but Alhamdulillah, I got through well!!! Passed with flying colours~~ (YEY!!! I've got my driving license!!!!!)
Last day at IB, it was the buka puasa event, so I got to help a bit. And I got a little something from them too. (I'm so going to miss the IB crew and technical staff :') )
Got the BIG news about Kak Aini's pregnancy while baking some cookies with my family. (So happy that we cried :') Syukur Alhamdulillah! )
I got to fast the whole month! Weheww~ Lucky me!! :D

September:

For the first time after so many years, we got to celebrate our Eid together as a family. A bigger family now. :)
Came to London. (mixed feeling.. sad, yet thrilled to start a new life :) )
1st Term started and I had made a lot of new great international friends..

October:

Ayah, Mummy, Abang Nash and Kak Nora came to London. Had a marvelous time, sightseeing together. :)
First time experiencing daylight saving on the day the that clocks go back 1 hour. Weheww~ (Got extra 1 hout to sleep... Hahaha)

November:

Got another awesome news, telling that Kak Mass is pregnant too!!! (YEYY~ I'll be a double auntie, InsyaAllah!!! )
Went for Nottingham Games.
Had a weird birthday where some friends ditched me. Hahahhaha! Okay, maybe the mobile line was bad... Or birthdays in Kobe were always awesome. Well, we can't get everything, can we ;p (But still thanks to those who wished, gave me presents and Ainaa and friends who made a tupperware of tiramisu for me! :))

December:

My 1st term ended.... Winter holiday started (Phew~)
Went to Holland to visit my dearest Abang Nash and Kak Nora!! (Grrrreeeatt holiday!)
Nadz came down to London. Met some of her friends. (First time on the London Eye, and my first time of Boxing Day! :D)

Well, to sum it up, as far as I can remember, 95% are happy moments. Or maybe even more than 95%. I do hope this coming year of 2012 will be equally as AWESOME or even far better year for me. And all of you!

Happy new year everybody!! :)

p/s: i'm sorry. suddenly the post looks kinda personal. hehe.. can't help it :P

waiting for the clock to strike 12~ :P

a tale of a girl

2011-11-14T19:41:00.001+09:00

once upon a time, a little girl who was brought up by a pair of loving parents has been told to love everyone. she has been taught to see the world as a whole, be kind and treat people nicely. her parents and family members make her lead a very happy life thinking that everyone in the world is equally as nice.

when she was in her primary school she was so happy because what her parents told her was true. everyone was innocent and seemed so sweet. when she went to secondary school, she saw the life was becoming a bit rough. but she was still a very happy person. still a lot of nice people can be found.

but her doubt about life increases as she gets older. she feels that it is weird that how can people be less sensible and less sensitive when they get older. she thought people will get more mature and she was expecting more love will be spread around. sadly she only sees weird situations where people who are not bothered with other people's feeling are just increasing.

people without common sense. people who do not keep their promises. people who do just as they like. people who bail on someone. and. so. much. more.

this girl doesn't like it anymore so she just wrote it in her blog.

end

that's just awkward~~

2011-10-21T04:45:00.001+09:00

Awkward moment or embarrassing moment. You name it. I don't know why when sometimes we have a normal happy chit chat, suddenly the ending part can be a real turn off. From one excited feeling to... booOm! An awkward one.

A lot of things have happened in London but I haven't updated anything yet. Well, not just yet. Too many things to handle especially this weekend. Because of this heavy load, suddenly I have the feeling to just write, yeah, to unwind a bit.

Back to the topic about awkward moment. I am not really good at handling these particular situation. It's like, I get dumbstruck and hope that the moment will just pass by. Let me tell you some situations when I wish my talking partner didn't mention or say those things.

Situation 1:
- There were 3 of us in the kitchen. Talking happily with each other in rather a friendly mode. Asking questions that we thought were relevant, looking at each other preparing our own dinner, until one of the girls left us to skype with her sister. And there was the small sweet looking girl left in the kitchen with me. I was already having my meal in the kitchen (tried to be friendly by eating in the kitchen just to meet my flatmates) while the girl was putting some food in her rice cooker. I started telling her how I was so lazy to start cooking properly. Since I still have the instant food, I should just eat them before they go bad. She was collecting her stuff to bring them back in her room. And before leaving she said to reply to my story, "Oh, yeah! That's why. I was thinking, what ARE you eating?!"

-____-

How could she say that!! I was eating something decent okay! Breads with chicken curry!! (Yep, instant chicken curry. Don't stare at me! I can cook curry okayh! It's just that I still don't have a knife to cook...) Anyway, I felt so stupid that I didn't know what to answer. I easily just laughed and looked at her opening and shutting the kitchen door.

*DANG!*

Situation 2:
- I was in the Muslim prayer room. Prayed Zohor prayer and rested there to wait for my next class. There was another Malay girl sitting next to me. Feeling so glad to have met another Malay, we talked and talked so much. She's such a sweet girl and seems so friendly. Had so much fun talking that I didn't realise it was almost time to go to class. I knew I had to make my move and said to her, "Okay, I have to go now. Nice meeting you. Will see around yeah! ;) " I zipped up my bag and started to make my move. On the spot she replied and said: "Yeah, See you. And you better buy a new bag sis!"

-____-

WHAT??? (For your information, there IS some err MINOR defect to the zipper of my bag. But it is STILL in a good condition. Yeah2, trying to justify myself) Well anyway, shouldn't we have a proper goodbye? SOBSS!! Luckily I like that girl that I didn't really feel like strangling her. Fuh! So I just gave her a light laugh and we exchanged salam.

Well, those are 2 embarrassing situations (for me) at the end of a conversation. Here's another one which top the list. It happened at the early conversation.

Situation 3:
- It was a 20 minutes break for our lecture. A few minutes before class started, one girl who is taking the same module with me entered. I was talking with my friend who was sitting behind me. The girl sat a few seats away from my friend and I can't remember clearly how but suddenly the girl was talking to me. She asked me where I come from. I told her 'Malaysia' and I asked her back. She said, '**********' (censor for safety purposes)' I might have given her a stupid look or something, that she started to explain where her country is. Roughly I got the idea and nodded saying,'Oh! Okay!' And guess what she replied?

'YOUR GEOGRAPHY IS REALLY BAD!'

-_____________________-

HELLO! It's our first encounter! Can't you say something nicer? (And we didn't get to ask each other's name. Thank god our lecturer came back to start the class) Huu~~ But I guess it's alright. Maybe people when they get older, they tend to say everything what they think right from their mind.

*Should I turn into one as well?*

I want!!!!

2011-10-14T07:38:00.003+09:00

i want to be happy 24/7.

i want to have a lot of money and spend them on the things i love.

i want my best friends to always be there.

i want my family to stay with me all the time.

i want my parents to stay with me in london for the whole year.

i want things to go my way!!!

SHOUT to my ears NOW and tell me that it's not going to happen. Hurm~~ Okay, so i asked for the impossible. SIGH!

Err, ok.. One more time. Last one.

I just want to be a good student and live a good life in London and get good results! That's all I'm asking for at the moment.

Does that sound possible enough? ;)

Journey to the west.

2011-09-13T12:50:00.003+09:00

My last post was in June?? 3 freaking months ago? Haish! How can that be possible? For 5 months of holiday I still can't bring myself to scribble something. Yeah, I am totally annoyed with myself now. T.T

Anyway, everyone seems so attached with facebook and twitter nowadays that I am grateful I can know more about my family and friends better no matter what the real distance among us is. From the looks of it, my friends are or have been busy preparing for their wedding or engagement days. Congrats from me to you dearies!! I am so happy for all of you~

Sadly I am busy for something else. Busy preparing myself to leave the country! Huwaa~~ (bunyi macam kena buang negara lah pulak)

Exactly in 3 days I am leaving on the jet plane to be taken away from my beloved Malaysia. No more east, I am now heading west. InsyaAllah to London for my postgraduate course. Please pray for me that everything is safe and smooth sailing for me.

And most important of all, I pray to Allah to keep my faith to You and to strengthen my Iman. O Allah please guide me to the right path and protect me from any harm. Only to you I seek for help and guidance. Amin!

Bye bye long happy holiday~ Gonna miss this laid back relaxing life. Gonna miss you dear Malaysia, and most definitely, the the heavenly food. ;D

Tata~

say no to self pity

2011-06-01T21:35:00.004+09:00

always be strong. always show your positive side. show to others how pleasant and happy life is. sharing good things with people is better than telling the sad stories of yours. of course there is nothing wrong in saying how we truly feel, how high our hope is for our life to get better. but isn't there a lot of other good things happen in our everyday life instead of just SORROW and AGONY?

telling people how sad we are is acceptable once in a while. but again and again whining about how life treats you bad doesn't change anything. at first people might pity you, but if you overdo it, people might get bored and might even think that there is DEFINITELY something wrong with you.

anyway, keep splashing good vibes around you. smile more. live life to the fullest and be appreciative in everything that we have. remember, no matter how difficult our life is, there are still people who are dying and struggling to even breathe some fresh air.

so, lets us all delete these few words:

sick, pain, die, heartache, loser, trouble, bad news, sadness etc2...

say UGHhhhh to these words!!!

and say YESSSS to: HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY DAYSSS~~ =)

i have my parents by my side

2011-05-08T10:57:00.006+09:00

i am the luckiest person on earth...

i am THE luckiest person on earth...

i AM the luckiest person on earth....

i definitely AM the LUCKIEST person on earth!!

oh what the heck. i love saying it so many many many times in different intonation and different ways. as i do believe that! =))

i have 2 main reasons for saying that.

one, i have the greatest father in the whole world.
number two, i have the greatest mother in the whole world.

everyone is celebrating mothers day, but my family has a double celebration today. as well as it is Mother's Day, it is also my father's Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =))

to my ever coolest ayah, you definitely are my dad, my teacher, my entertainer, my best friend and always always, my hero.

to my ever charming mummy, you are of course, my mother, my sunshine, my doctor, my shopping partner, and always always my role model.

the both of you are my life. my soul. my EVERYTHING!!! you mean the world to me...

i love you sooOo soOo much! only God knows how much i love the both of you. i can't imagine living without you. please, never ever abandon your child here, as i am still and always be a kid when i am next to you. ALWAYS!

so, here goes my wish to the both of u:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AYAH, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MUMMY.

may Allah bless you with eternal happiness, health, love and everything good that can ever be received.

again and again....

I LOVE YOU! =)

MUAHXXxxxxXXX!

where can i find such place?

2011-05-05T18:13:00.002+09:00

i wish to have a secret hideout to let out any disturbed feelings.
any negative feelings that can't be shared with anyone else.

i feel like going on top of a hill and just scream out loud.
where no one can hear. where no one can get hurt.

but i am still here. on a chair. in front of my laptop.

and nothing changes. nothing ever can change if no action is taken.

i am still here. keeping my mouth shut. but no desire to let it out.

Ramblings

2011-04-22T14:36:00.004+09:00

I always wish I could express myself better. I don't understand why it is so hard for me to show the kind of things that I like, especially when I mix with other people. As a result of that, I always end up doing what other people prefer to do. Even I don't really like it, I tend to just say yes, and follow suit.

WHY?

Maybe I am just the type of person who doesn't really know what I like and what I really want. It is also much easier to adapt with others' liking rather than to convince people around me that what I like is so much better. Whenever I try to voice an opinion on where to go, or what to do, it always sounds lame to other people's ear. Probably. That's what I think. That's why I surrender easily and just let them be happy.

It is also very rare to see what people really know about me that it always makes me feel so touched whenever there is any. They might know I am a person of thousand words, never stop talking, yadaa yadaa, but I don't think they really know what kind of things I like. For instance, my favourite food, favourite band, favourite TV show, my ideal spot for holiday and so much more.

Besides that, I also realise that I sometimes convey the wrong message to other people. I really hate it when people misunderstand my true intention. When I actually want to praise somebody, people think I am actually being sarcastic. Was it just my tone or people tend to judge I am just a sarcastic person? When I try to tell a story, people also tend to make it into a bad thing. I don't know anymore. Maybe I am just a talkative person, but not really good in conveying.

Okay, enough rambling. Maybe I would delete this post once I feel a lot better, or when I am much better in expressing myself! daa~

P/S: sorry for those people who take time to read this unmeaningful post!

unconditional love

2011-04-13T12:00:00.006+09:00

i wish i could learn not to love something or someone too much. i have always been so attached to something that it always tears my heart each time i have to be apart with it. though i rarely show my feelings and always appear positively alright, but deep down only God knows how hard i try to persuade myself that everything is going to be okay.

on my last day at high school, i remember well enough how empty my heart was. neither the bright shining sun nor the loud playing songs could lift up my spirit. just the thought of being away from my friends whom i have been living with for 5 whole years, made my heart sink. of course it was hard to say goodbye as we practically shared almost everything as it was a boarding school. for us girls, we lived under the same roof, we shared the same toilet and sometimes we even shared the same bed. (T__T) so, yeah, u got it. it was just a sad day for everyone.

us, having lunch at the dining hall

resting under the big tree when no one was around. yeah, only the form 5 students left.

our final goodbye. (Oops, soOo sorry girls, our faces were #$%&$% HAHAHAH)

somehow i thought i have learned a lesson on not to be so attached with the people around, but i don't seem to get it quite right. i must have spent so much time with the Kobeians i guess. to think again about it, well, sure enough i have done almost everything with them. hanging out together almost every weekend, having sleepovers and of course, 'makan-makan', which has always been a tradition even before i came to Kobe. we have always reminded ourselves that we are one big family, as we only have each other especially when our real family is far far away across the oceans.

my house warming

preparation to break our fast during Ramadan

our hari raya, picture taken at Kobe University

my last day in Japan. 30th March 2011. thanks all. love you all to pieces.

with the Kobeians i can actually understand quite well, but what surprises me is that i feel equally as sad to leave my labmates. i have spent time with them for only a few months. not even a year. if it were 2010, today would be my first time meeting my labmates and senseis. yes, exactly a year ago, i met these charming people of ES1 (the name of my lab) and ever since that day my days were full of music. again, i got attached. with this group of great people, i just couldn't help it.

the first time we went for bowling together

a dinner with my batchmates

our graduation day =)

the only picture i have with my beloved Sensei. no words can describe how thankful i am to have you as my sensei. Thank you so much sensei for all the support you have given me.
お世話になりました！

on my last day stepping out of the lab after saying goodbye to my seniors, i got this shaky feeling inside. my eyes felt kinda hot. i can't remember whether they were watery or not, but what i knew at that time was my life is just not going to be the same again. no more lab visits daily. no more tip toeing into the lab each time i go during weekends and see someone is asleep on the couch, no more early and long lunch breaks with my batchmates, no more concern questions from my beloved senior on my work, no more teasing voices and ....... haih ..... i guess that's going to be my last encounter with Japanese people. T___T

today is also the 2nd week i am in Malaysia. no matter how tough it is to be separated with those across the oceans, it still feels good to be here. to where my heart always belongs to. to where my family is.

the place where i call home.

as we exited KLIA. (it should have said, welcome home afiqah! but oh well, this is good enough.)

guess what i found on my bed when i first stepped in my bedroom! definitely a pleasant surprise.

and something i really miss having: a family dinner =)

seems like this is my full time commitment from now on. to think of it again, it's never a crime to be attached with something, right?

especially with your own family. give them your unconditional love! =)

Gambare Nippon!

2011-03-17T13:37:00.010+09:00

it has been quite awhile since i last updated my blog. my initial plan was to write on my final year presentation, my holidays and my future plans after i get my scroll. only happy stories crossed my mind at that time.

but everything changed the moment Japan was struck by the most powerful earthquake which was followed by the disastrous tsunami. and now, everyone is worried about the radioactive leaks in Fukushima. it happens too fast, that it seems all like a dream. more like a scary nightmare actually.

though i am in Kobe and still too far away from the affected areas, i can still feel the pain for those who are involved in this catastrophe. the day it happened, all the channels had nothing else on air except news updating on the current situation. up till today, it has been the headline on the television and also in the papers.

however, i am really amazed by the Japanese attitude towards this problem. we always see how people normally just cry over their loss and wait for brighter days to come. but it is a different story here whereby everyone is really positive and very efficient in handling problems. they seem really calm though we know how much they suffer and want to cry because of this nightmare. but they do not give up, stand tall and keep on doing their best to make everything better for everyone.

a lot of touching and heart moving stories i have read on the net. try clicking here and you will definitely know what i mean. on the television, no more advertisement on shampoos, biscuits etc2, but messages on people relationship are shown to remind everyone in Japan. one of best the quotes from the commercial is:

「心」は誰にも見えないけれど、「心遣い」は見える。「思い」は見えないけれど、「思いやり」は誰にでも見える。

no one can see our 'heart', but 'concern' can be seen. 'thought' can't be seen, but everyone can see 'thoughtfulness'.

everyone is doing everything that is possible to support and to help one another. the Japanese government is doing their best for everyone in Japan. while everyone else in the world only sees the disastrous side of Japan, i am glad i can see the beauty and the warm side of the Japanese people. they are strong people and always accept whatever happen to them. they don't know the meaning of surrender. just like a Japanese old man who was saved 42 hours after the tsunami said with a smile, "let's rebuild".

with strong will and determination like this, i believe they can make it through, insyaAllah. i hope everyone can learn something from the Japanese people. everytime we feel like something is not on our side, quit complaining, find our way to do our best and pray hard to achieve the best result. for us Muslims, after giving our best, leave it to Allah. InsyaAllah, with God's will, we will get what we want.

I really hope that everyone in the world no matter what religion we are, please put our heart together and pray for Japan. pray for their safety and hope that everything gets back to normal. I just love Japan more and more everytime i watch their spirit and determination that it makes it even harder for me to leave this country for good. but no matter where I am later, I will never forget what this country has done to me. Thank you Japan for the knowledge, the experience, the never ending lovely days I always lead day by day here. You all will always be in my prayers.

I love you Nihon! Gambare Nippon!

lastly, here's a song InsyaAllah by MaherZain. such a calm song and it makes me feel more relaxed everytime listening to the lyrics. =)

presents!!! i love you!!!

2011-02-08T21:54:00.003+09:00

i have met someone who hates presents.

ok, that's a lie.

i have never met anyone who hates presents.

ok, now, that's a fact.

i just received a lovely present from my beloved juniors a few days ago, that i feel so excited to blog about it. it's hard to buy presents for people, but it doesn't seem that difficult for my beloved friends to find one for me.

the keyword in getting a present for someone is actually:

being observant.

yeah, just be aware of the person's life, and you'll definitely know what to get them.

but oh well, you see, actually i'm not choosy. you can just get anything for me. you don't have to wait for my birthday to give me presents. it's ok~~ anytime will do. seriously!

so~~~~ in that case..... i'll be waiting~~~ =D

anyway, here's another vlog on presents! =)

of holidays, final year project and chinese new year wish! =)

2011-02-03T21:56:00.005+09:00

please be patient with my stupid video here. i did this on tuesday. and please pardon my malayish english and grammar mistakes. hahha!

a bit late though, but yeah... better late than never! happy chinese new year people!! =)

what now? vlogging maybe? =P

2011-02-01T20:30:00.000+09:00

no more zemi for this year!!!! yey yey yey!!!! who cares how i presented just now. who cares how the 5 of us got a long lecture by our lecturer because we started the zemi 1 minute and a half late. yeah yeah, who cares right! what we care is that we are just a few days away from freedom.

i think i might suggest my labmates to put a countdown chart on the door. so that they are aware of how many days left for them to be nice to a lovely malay girl in the lab. hurm..... seriously i might as well do that. (things to bring to bring to lab the day after tomorrow: kalendar ngan paku tekan. huh? what happen to tomorrow? of course ponteng! =P)

anyway, it's great to see the sun is finally shining brightly again.
also the stars and moon shine brighter at night.

well, i guess they shine equally as bright, it's only me who didn't really realise it. blame all the work and stress. afiqah the nature lover wasn't aware of the surrounding these past few weeks.

tsk... so sad...

3 nature lovers gazing at the sky

anyway, enough babbling. i need to find something worthwhile doing. other than eating.

okay, since people nowadays like to....

VLOG=video blog...

i might try that out. should i?? hahahah!!lets see if i have the talent to do so.. LOL

now, time to find the camera :D

22-2-2

2011-01-28T22:26:00.004+09:00

today i turn 22years 2 months and 2 days old. why don't i wait till the 22nd day? well, simply....because it is just difficult to count. :P

anyway there is nothing significant to this day actually. i just feel like updating my blog, and updating means, i have so much free time on my hands.

really? hahah! well, that is not exactly true, as i still have one last presentation to go before my final BIG presentation on the last day of february. but oh well, since i have passed up my thesis to my lecturer, i guess i can now at least take a deep breath and relax a bit. :)

.
.
.
.
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i was really thinking of relaxing. but something made my heart stop for a moment. earthquake.
yeah, just a few minutes ago while i was in the middle of writing this post, it happened. it really has been awhile since my last experience with earthquake which you can read it here. compared to last time, this one wasn't so bad. but it was still, quite shocking. >.<

*inhale* *exhale*

and now i am just grateful i can live up till now. hope i can live longer.

longer than just 22 years 2 months and 2 days old.

@lab

2011-01-17T23:27:00.007+09:00

@lab

well, that has been my status on ym since my 1st day i entered the lab. since i keep forgetting to sign out from my email or to change the status whenever i am NOT at lab, people always get the idea that i spend my whole 24hours at lab. okay people, that is soOo not true. i have life too you know!

however, to tell the truth, i seriously don't mind spending most of my time at my lab. well, besides getting to save the electric bills etc (yeah, i am a cheapskate! ;P) i find it's relaxing just to be there. it's like the perfect hideout for me whenever i feel like getting away for awhile from a stressful moment. well, not that i have something to get stressed about, but i just love doing my work from my desktop at the table, with the additional aroma of coffee my seniors love to make, and listening to the chit chatting voices of my labmates which most of the conversations are funny.

working with them is an experience i have never felt before as they are truly helpful lot especially my senior who has been cracking his head most of the time for me. like i have told my brother, 95% of my success story actually comes from my senior, and the remaining 5% is probably my own hard work. (is there really any??)

yeah, i'm such a spoiled junior. i know.... T.T

realising that i only have a few more months to spend with my labmates, i actually feel rather sad. i don't know how i will act on my last day at school later. i know quite well that it would be hard for me to meet them again once i have gone back to Malaysia for good. not only that, i guess this would probably be the last chance for me to have fun and feel at ease with japanese people.

so, what about.....working in a japanese company?

hurmmmmmm.... i don't think i can classify that as FUN. at least not a single Malaysian has survived long enough with a broad smile working with them. hoho... i don't know how my future will turn out to be. i REALLY have no idea~~ for now, all i have to focus is to finish up my thesis and, looking for a university to continue my masters.

and for now, let me enjoy my few last days @LAB! =)

me, so not doing my work at my beloved lab =P

GREAT excuses to be excused

2010-12-26T13:59:00.007+09:00

26th december! it's my sister's one year wedding anniversary. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY big sis n bro-in -law! =)

WHOA~ it also implies that i am one year older from the day my sister got married. at this same time of last year, i was busy entertaining people who came to our house for the akad nikah session. yeah, in MALAYSIA.

and now, at this time of the year, i am obviously in KOBE. doing some work at lab, trying to finish up my last minute experiment. uhuk3, so sad, thinking that everyone is probably enjoying a cup of hot chocolate in this breezing winter at a cool cafe, or probably enjoying the long queue at an entertainment park, or enjoying a snowboard trip yadaa yadaaa... T.T

okay, not jealous. definitely not. in fact, i am really excited myself to visit my lab on a weekend because tomorrow, will be my last day of schooling before my winter holiday starts!!! yeay!!! oh, im gonna miss my lab~~~ LOL! so, who cares whether other people have started their holidays earlier. to have a reasonably long holiday during my final year is better than nothing. right? :D

and to top that, my brother is coming to town~~~~ give 3 cheers for my big handsome brother!! hip hip! hoorayyyh! ( saje nk mintak abang belanja... :D)
yeah, he is coming on the 30th december and i can't wait to spend some quality time with him. besides, my dear friend syairah is also coming around that time, that i am really sure it will turn out to be a great winter holiday. insyaAllah!

i told my senior that i can't attend his presentation this coming january as i need to send my brother off to the airport. he just widened his eyes and said: 'and now it's your BROTHER?'
i just laughed. though it might sound a bit like a sarcasm, i guess he accepted it well enough as he said he doesn't mind, and he's going to save a copy of his presentation sheet for me later on. =P
thanks sempai! ^^

oh well, i don't blame any of my labmates if they ever think that i am only making excuses for not going to school. last june i had to go back to malaysia for my SISTER's wedding reception. last september i didn't attend the conference with the rest as my PARENTS were coming to kobe. and this time around, it's my BROTHER. he's coming to pay me a visit! hahahahaha!! how can i not love my family so much. they have given me some realllllly good excuses to be on a holiday! :D

it makes me think. imagine if i have more than 3 siblings.............. hurm~~~

HAHAH! okay, dream on afiqah! bagi betis nak peha!

there, mok 1, mok 2 and mok 3, ie: my brother, my sis n the patriotic me! =P

p/s: well, anyway, before it gets too late, HAPPY HOLIDAYS everyone!!!!! =))

2007 to 2011

2010-12-12T21:46:00.008+09:00

it's only the 6th day of our Islamic hijrah year. the 6th day of year 1432. what have we achieved in year 1431 and what are we aiming for this new year? not only we have opened a 'new book' for hijrah calendar, but our year 2010 is also coming to an end.

yes, at last!!! the year 2011 is coming. it is just around the corner.

i have been waiting for 2011 to come since 22nd march of 2007. that was my first day i ever put my two feet on this country of sunrise. that was the day i understood how people can live in a verrryy small unit. it was also the first day i was amazed by their toilet washlet system. well, definitely very advance! =)

my early days in japan, year 2007 ^^

during that year, my 4th year seniors always told me that 4 years is not that long. time just flies and without even realising it, it will be the time to take our scroll. hurm, and true enough it doesn't seem that long that i can't believe myself that i am going to leave this country for good in just a few months' time and i am super excited!!! to be exact, i am super duper excited!! =))

these past 4 years have taught me a lot, a lot more than i can ever learn in my own country. here, i learn to live as a Muslim in a country with people who most of them have no faith in religion, people who have not much idea of Islam. not many Muslims can be seen around but we appreciate each other more that we will always greet one another by giving salam whenever we meet. in Malaysia, i don't really get that warm greetings from other Muslims as it is too normal to find another Muslim i guess.

here, i also learn to be the black sheep. the one that is TOTALLY different from the rest. obviously i look different with my tudung and all. i also speak weird japanese. up till today i don't speak fluently. i know that sometimes my dearest labmates make fun of my kansai-ben. (kansai dialect) GRRRR!!! wait till i make fun of your malay! and that IF you can speak malay T.T
being the only one that doesn't drink those beers and sakes during drinking parties, the only one who doesn't eat meat, chicken, pork etc etc (and each time i have to explain why) but i still survive up till today and i still had fun hanging out with them. the most i appreciate is that they respect my view and never ridicule my beliefs. and the one that i love the most is when they try so hard and go all out to consider the food that i can or can't eat each time i join any parties. =)))

and here, i have a wider view of friendship. i know who i can rely on and who i can't really trust. as we grow older, we become wiser (i guess) and we can see people for who they really are. i can never be grateful enough for those who have stood by me through my thick and thin. you all are real keepers. also, leaving far away from the people whom i love shows that distance doesn't at all break a bond.

since year 2007 to 2011, i have met a lot of people along the way. hateful people who are hypocrites, backstabbers, sweet talkers with a dark evil side, gossipers, and a real pain in the a** kind of people. but of course, on the other hand i have also met real sweethearts who are really sensitive towards people's feeling, caring, generous, lovable and a real friend in need. these are the ones who keep me strong during my days in japan. no matter how little or much time we have spent together, the great memories will always remain in my heart. i don't have to mention names here as you know who you are =)))

2010 is coming to an end soon. and i hope i will find more sweethearts and less pain in the a** kind of people before i make my move back to my beloved country. nobody wants to mix around with the wrong people or we will end up having a heart ache right? and as for that, my resolution for the new year is to be more patient and to be a better person in whole so that i won't fall into the hateful people category. ;)

now this is a real sweetheart! =)

KY: kuuki yomenai

2010-12-05T00:36:00.004+09:00

don't be so touchy!

ohkayyy, that is also one kind of being sensitive. but what i'm going to state here is about being able to read the situation and being considerate to other people's feeling. in easy words, put ourselves in others' shoes.

wonder how to be a sensitive person? just ask ourselves these few questions.

do we like to be treated in that kind of way? is it appropriate to do such thing or to ask such question at that particular moment? if we ourselves do not like to be treated in such way, than naturally others also don't. simple eh? we don't have to be mind readers to be able to read the situation.

people can sometimes be so insensitive and do something without considering one's situation. in japanese, people call it : KY, stands for kuuki yomenai.

try being pushy, inconsiderate, insensitive towards others feelings or situation, and say something without thinking, and voila~ you'll definitely be rated as the number one biggest KY.

the problem with these KY people is not that they are too lazy to open their eyes wide enough, but they are too cold-hearted and do not want to study the surrounding to respond or act accordingly. being sensitive doesn't kill you know.

for instant, take writing an sms as example. it doesn't hurt to have a friendly intro like asking how your friend is doing, whether he or she is in good health, any good news or perhaps just a 'hello' can never go wrong. these few words can make much difference rather than just typing your true intention such as, 'i want to borrow your shirt tonight, i'll take it on my way home later.' or 'i need you to come over and do a few things.'

(and the worst kind of all is those who just write 'k' in a reply to a loOong message.)

i can never understand when people need some help, but they end up making it more like an order. it's so much better to say politely so that others will feel easier to lend a hand. of course there are some people who can never reject when their help is needed, but never ever take their kindness for granted. no one likes to be taken granted for, no matter how kind that person is.

besides being very pushy in asking a favour, there are also people who do not know when to keep their opinions to themselves. they just say whatever as they like without thinking. of course there are things that are considered sensitive to a person, so it's better to respect their view and never talk something that they do not wish to listen or to be asked.

in simple words, just treat others the way how we want to be treated. it helps by asking ourselves whether or not we want to be friends with ourselves. if we find that we have flaws here and there which other people might not like, there is always room for improvement. definitely no one is perfect, that is why i need to remind myself too.

let's be a better person for a better tomorrow! =)

the prize for being positive ^^

2010-11-25T22:10:00.022+09:00

contented.

that's what everyone wants to feel. and that's what i'm feeling right now. being surrounded by love and more love everyday, that's the reason i'm smiling each and everyday. having family that understands and never stops praying for the best of me. having friends that support and share happiness with me. having people that contribute memories to my life. directly or indirectly, everyone has an impact on my life.

thank you for being there for me. =)

i always make this kind of post, and people might get bored already with my way of thinking. but being positive IS the easy way to get through the days. always and always remember how you are blessed by great people and the good things around you, and i'm pretty sure it will somehow brighten up your day.

many times my loved ones cry or feel down about something. neither i have the perfect way nor the perfect words to console them. all i could do is to make sure they feel good about themselves and no matter what situation they are in, i believe there will always be a way out. be positive towards everything, and you will be free.

you might not always feel special, but there are always people who feel you are special to them. believe in yourself more as there are always people who look up to you. to some people, you are like their hero, but you might just not notice it. just keep on moving and trust yourself more.

seriously, i really am feeling the good vibes. lately everything seems brighter and more fulfilling. i am so grateful of everything that has happened to me. Alhamdulillah is all i could say. =)

just a few pics of my latest happenings with the loved ones =)

just call my name and you'll make my day =)

2010-11-15T00:15:00.003+09:00

feel like making one's day?

why not start with a smile. a genuine smile which can brighten up one's day. inserting a 'hello' along with that beautiful smile will be much much better. seriously, you don't have to be the person's best friend in order to make his or her day. just be pleasant and the world will be by your side.

smile like him, and everybody will definitely melt! =)

if you have enough time, maybe you can be the one to start a conversation. break the silence, try to be a little bit chatty. if you really have no idea how, try with a simple compliment like, "you look really nice today." or "you seem happy, anything happen lately?". well, try not to use a busybody tone by the way. =P

however, just talk when you have something nice to say. people always say, "only talk when it's necessary." yeah, i like that, but i personally can't do that. i always find something to say and end up talking too much. ugh~ (you can find me a little bit quiet when i am around my japanese friends though. yeah2, language barrier. tell me about it! >.<)

words can either have good or bad effect. depends on how we convey them. even when we want to give out some opinions we really need to be careful with our chosen words. maybe we have good intention and never want to hurt anybody's feeling, but being a mr know-it-all doesn't at all help the situation.

well, it's not that difficult to make one's day actually. even small children can be unpredictable and make our day. just like today, my friend's daughter knew my name!

her mother asked her, "do you remember this kakak's name?" she nodded and replied, "kakak cun!"

YEAH!!! do you see what i mean?? she made my day just by calling my name! =))

yes, she's the one who made my day! =)

and this sweet boy here made my day by taking my picture =)

p/s: i had the greatest weekend! thanks dearest kobeians for always making my days in japan so so meaningful. though our real family is so far away, we all here are like family to each other. love you all to pieces!

this is my fairy tale

2010-11-09T09:00:00.000+09:00

sometimes people wish that life would be more like a fairy tale.

just ask the magic mirror to make sure you always look good.

just get a pet mouse to help you make a beautiful dress.

just pluck a poison apple when you want to torture your enemy. T.T

just sing to your heart's content, and a prince will come along and join you singing.

ugh... okay, so life is not that simple. we need to work hard in achieving something, that's for sure. we even need to work hard just to wake up in the morning! forget all those dreams about having birds that chirp beautiful songs through your bedroom window as wake up call. learn to struggle with noisy alarm clocks or vibrating hand phones (and learn not to destroy them while hitting the snooze button). learn to finish up something ourselves. there are no elves living under our beds which will only crawl out at night to finish up our work. this is the real life. whether we like it or not, we have to learn to do everything ourselves. it's not that bad you know. =)

so, remind me again why we have to struggle to gain something?

yes! it's because it makes our success means a lot more and tastes sweeter when we achieve it with our own hard work. naturally, if everything is too easy and achievable in a blink of an eye, we won't know what the true meaning of satisfaction is. God makes life in such way that disappointments come hand in hand with happiness. in order to get something, there will always be some difficulties along the way.

well, if we look it from a fairy tale way, even the princes and princesses have to defeat the mouth-full-of-stinking-hot-fire dragons or at least got cheated by an evil fairy before they make their way to their live-happily-ever-after ending. phew, lucky we don't dragons in real life. or else, we need firemen in every corner of the town. >.<

anyway, like a quote i read this morning,

Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale of all. - Hans Christian Andersen

hooyeah! right after reading this, i'm soOo getting ready to face the world! i'm on my way to make my own wonderful fairy tale, peeps!

yeah, starting from getting ready to go to school. >.<

so.....

to all of you, all the best in creating your own version of happy ending story! you might wanna check out yourself if there really is a prince charming with a wide kingdom, waiting somewhere for you ^^

p/s: i don't know what happen to my laptop lately, it has been unwell these past few days. i can't type certain letters such as o, p, l and a few other functions. but once in a while, i can use it without any problem just like now. and so, that is my excuse for not updating my blog everyday like other bloggers... (hah! lame excuse! LOL)

yikes! i have zemi (my lab's weekly presentation) in only an hour's time! gotta rush! daa~ =)

higher!! higher!!

2010-11-03T12:30:00.001+09:00

we made a circle and played with the balloon. pretending the balloon as a volley ball, we hit it and passed it among ourselves, around the circle. weird though how much we hit it, the balloon didn't go any higher. nobody paid any attention at how high the balloon was hit. everyone was more focused on talking rather than hitting. again, weird, i couldn't remember what topic we were discussing on. i was paying more attention to the balloon.

i guess.

came my turn and my eyes were bright. i collected my energy and determined to hit it higher. yeah! much much higher. that's what my mission was. no one wanted to do it properly, so let it be me!

1, 2, 3.... HIT!!!!!

*********************************************************************************

crussssshhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

huh? what happened? where did the balloon go?

it was hard to see. it was dark, but slowly my eyes caught some light. the moment i saw my surrounding, i knew there won't be any balloon, nor any chit chatting friends. i knew then that it was just a 'balloony' dream.... ugh

and guess what i hit instead???

my LAPTOP!!

it was on my side table. it didn't fall on the floor. but instead, i found my table lamp on the floor. oh, so it was u waking me up from that dream.... waaaaa!!! my favourite lamp!!!!!

i almost jumped out of my bed to check on my lamp. huh, it was a relief seeing nothing was broken. only the filament in the bulb was literally chopped off. oh, you poor little lamp. that must be some push i gave you T.T

stupid dream. because of you i had to play with wires, making sure my laptop and table lamp were okay, at 3 o'clock in the morning!!!!

ugh, seriously, why did i have to be so determined in everything. why the hell did i want to hit that stupid balloon anyway.... sigh!

p/s: i just finished up my 4th presentation yesterday! n today the whole japan is on holiday, celebrating for me!! yey!! eh, bukan ke?... it's their culture day today. hehe, whatever~ :P

sneeze sneeze cough cough

2010-10-20T09:39:00.005+09:00

i think i am catching a cold and it sucks big time to be in this state where your family is nowhere near. i can't stop sneezing and everywhere is just too cold for me, but when i switch off the fan, i feel really uncomfortable. i don't feel like going to the lab but my work awaits. not forgetting i have a meeting with my sensei (lecturer) this evening. (sensei, can we have the meeting in my house instead? >.<)

haih, if only i were 7 years old. how i miss being pampered by my family. they will definitely take a good care of me. even when i got stomach ache i would be running to my parents' room and cry for some 'minyak panas.' when i had a fever, my mother will keep changing a wet cloth on top of my head to reduce the temperature. being fed with porridge and taken care of medicines, i would get better only in couple of days.

nothing seems appealing when we are not feeling well. but one thing for sure, my appetite for food still doesn't change. and tonight a great junior invites me and my housemate for dinner! oh, i do hope they won't be catching a cold from me. i suppose this must be because of the changing season. huhu... so, my last words to all you before heading school:

drink a lot of water
wear something thick enough according to the weather
sleep well (not too little, not too much)
take supplements everyday also won't hurt
be active
last but not least, eat well! you are what you eat =)

p/s: regarding to my last post about these busybodies, it's no doubt people just hate to be gossiped about. however, we should always beware not to be one of them. i've read this post on a blog and how true it turns out to be! ;)

deal with them with patience

2010-10-15T22:33:00.004+09:00

there are two types of people.

1- people who can't shut their mouth and tell something that other people should not know.
2- people who just LOVE to know about other people's story. mainly because they just LOVE gossips.

sometimes i don't really blame people who tell 'inside' stories because i know, people like number '2' can be really persuasive at times. but no matter what, people should know their boundaries. there are things better left unsaid. for example, family problem is one of the topics one should not discuss with random people. it is best not to tell anything bad about any of your family members or your partners (wife or husband) to friends. problems should be settled among themselves. the involvement of a 3rd party always brings bad ending.

and what do we call people like number 2? oh, that's simple! BUSYBODY!! and in simple malay: suka jaga tepi kain orang lain. i know people have desires to know other people's update. but somehow this kind of people seem to enjoy stories that are bad which are 'hot and spicy' enough to be told to other people. they can really go all out just to get some stories and it means the most if they are the first to know. why can't they feel satisfied with just good stories of their friends?

haih~ i can really get speechless when i encounter with this kind of situation. these people are everywhere. the world is beautiful but we always need to be careful with unexpected turn outs. i just hope i don't explode if anyone ever does this kind of things to me.

i really need to learn to be more patient. yes, with this people, we need loads and loads of patience.

how about a change in lifestyle?

2010-10-13T06:05:00.004+09:00

too much time on computer lately. my eyes are getting soar. at school i have no other choice than to sit in front of two computer screens. dealing with work means dealing with computers. at home, having 'me me me' time also with my laptop. can't help feeling that my social life is already down the drain.

i tried to play less with my facebook. yeah, thinking that i will end up socializing with people more. during weekends it is kinda successful. but now, during weekdays? bah~ no can do. i try reading story books at home, and ended up sleeping on the bed earlier than i thought. no matter how hard i try, at the end i will still start looking for something to type. type type type. ooho, meaning, back to the computer. what a lame life.

sometimes i wonder, do we get stuck with this kind of life style till the day we reach 70? 80? i can't imagine my grandmothers playing with the internet. haha! and have u read this?

Malaysians have the most friends on their social networks, while Japanese users have the fewest.

weeheeeheee~~~ i'm in the middle of two extreeeeeme countries!!! a malaysian, studying in japan.

okay come on everyone! take our butts off the chair, take our eyes off the screen and lets do something healthy for a change. lessay, going out for a jog, NOW? we can really make a change, can't we?

when tomorrow never comes

2010-09-30T00:14:00.009+09:00

when we are happy celebrating a new born baby, trust me, at the same time there must be someone at some part of the world is also crying for losing someone, forever.

that is life. no one lives forever.

last 2 days, a birthday reminder from my facebook noted that it's a particular person's birthday. normally i would just wish anyone on my friend's list no matter how close i am with him or her because i know even a random and simple wish can make the person's day.

yes, if i could, i would. except, i couldn't. even if i wrote on the wall, the person just wouldn't get to reply it.

why? because she is no longer in this world. it has been almost a year since this young girl has left us. i feel like i am still in a state of shock because lately there are too many bad news about the lost of people who are dear to some people. and of course, to me.

on the 2nd day of raya, i lost my uncle who was very close to my family. to my parents, he was more of a friend than a mere 'biras' or 'ipar'. i remember during my secondary school, i used to stay at his house during weekends as my family was in kelantan at that time, and he and his family took a really good care of me. he was a successful person and i know he is loved by many people as he is really really generous and kind-hearted.

a few days before ramadhan, a very good friend of my brother was involved in a car accident and he couldn't be saved. it was a shocking piece of news because just a few days before he left us, was his birthday. and also, on the 7th day of syawal, a friend of mine whom i knew during AAJ days died because of an infection of the heart. yes, it broke my heart to hear all these news. not even a hari raya wish or a sorry i could tell them for any of my actions.

these news really make me think. if i were to go tomorrow, am i ready? what kind of things will i be remembered of? will people pray for me? and most of all, my ibadah. is it enough??

i am struggling with myself thinking these scary questions. i really hope only good things will be remembered when i leave. and also, like these late friends of mine, i sure hope people will pray and sedekah al-fatihah for me. anyway, i am taking this opportunity to ask for forgiveness to everyone for my wrongdoings. if i have hurt you in any way, i am truly sorry.

haih~ must be the wind from outside blowing so hard that i suddenly feel so melancholic. =P

and then.... again, there's another birthday reminder i couldn't wish.

al-fatihah to you my dear friend.

bye bye summer, helloOo autumn!

2010-09-26T22:22:00.005+09:00

hey, you can now put away your summer umbrellas, fancy fans, shorts, sleeveless and everything that you wear during the summer. now it's time for you to show off your new high heel boots, fury coats, a pair of new gloves and trendy muffler as it's no more summer bebeh!

ooh yes, you heard me!

for the last couple of days, it has been pretty cold. the temperature shot down in just 24 hours. for one day everyone was still fanning their faces with the free fans they got, and the next day people were literally freezing, for wearing the wrong outfit being unprepared for the cold day. and that, includes me. who knows the season can change in a day?

so, ' it's time to go gray this autumn-winter!,'said the magazine i read from somewhere. huh, like i care about the fashion and all. i always wonder why people turn all gray, black and colourless during the cold season? even the stalls are not selling flowery and colourful clothes anymore. that's sad. i love wearing and watching people with cheerful tone outfit. hurm, who ever make this silly rules anyway? luckily i don't really care about the latest trend, the things you should or should not wear yadaa yadaa... soOo....yippee! it means i'm free to wear anything!! yeah,unless it is thick and good enough to cover myself from cold. ^^

anyway, whatever you all might be wearing, i hope you all are prepared for the changing season and take care not to catch a cold!

**oh, the season really is changing as i can see that the stores are now having autumn sale and they are already selling pumpkins! yeah, for halloween. yeah, here, in japan. =P

when you feel down

2010-09-24T00:10:00.004+09:00

what do you do when you feel down?

A: pick up your phone and call your parents/friends
B: sleep
C: cry
D: eat
E: take a shower
F: go out and shop
G: you don't do anything, because you like it that way. >.<
H: all the above
I: none of the above (other answer:..................... )

i used to make a phone call (or phone calls) and talk non-stop with those who can listen to me talking when i feel low. well, obviously talking make me feel better. wayyy better than to be alone.

i was rather low when my parents left me for malaysia the other day. but instead of making a call to a friend or siblings, i went out shopping. shopping really is a cure to me. the moment i stepped off the bus, i went inside sogo, OIOI, daimaru and the list goes on.... i ended up getting home only around 8pm with almost 6 plastic bags in my hands. shop till you drop eh? yeah, you could say that. by the time i got home i was lethargic and forgot my sadness already.=)

oh well, sadness doesn't bring any good to me, you know. so to everybody out there, don't make me sad, or my purse will get thinner. =P

p/s: thanks to my ever good buddy pekah for calling me that day to make sure i was okay. hehe... so i didn't make a phone call, but i received some... thanks my great sis for your call and of course miss pekah.

p/p/s: i miss my parentsssssssssss T____________T

anyone, visit me will ya? air asia is making a promotion starting december.... rm99?? cheap huh? so what are you waiting for? you have a flight to book!! =D

::I MISS YOU::

2010-09-07T14:36:00.005+09:00

i miss you.

yeah, 3 simple words yet they are truly meaningful. sometimes people might just say that out of habit, but it doesn't really matter because it never fails to make me warm inside. those words undeniably make people feel appreciated and remembered. such a good feeling eh? =)

well, in my case, i mean my words when i tell someone i miss him or her. looking at pictures, listening to music and even smelling something can make you remember someone. in a few days more we will celebrate aidilfitri and everyone seems really excited to get home to see family members. many and many posts on hari raya here and there. online raya card also seems the latest thing nowadays, that i assume the postmen in malaysia no longer have to work extra time. hehe, good for them!

due to many wishes and status updates especially on facebook, i really feel kinda left out. only having the lab technician by my side (i wonder what he is doing going in and out of the lab), i suddenly have this 'rindu' feeling to be in malaysia. even majority of the malaysians in kobe have gone back to malaysia. and out of all days, my labmates just have to go to a conference TODAY. GOSH!! how could you all leave me behind??? huh, only now i start to miss all of u! >.<

oh well oh well, i'm tough u know? the reason i'm still hanging around in kobe and not following the rest to kyushu for the conference is that........my parents are finally arriving tomorrow!!! yipyipeee~!!!!! ignore everything else, put all the work aside, take the broom and start cleaning up!! yeah! that's my task for tonight =P

oh, wait a minute. did i say i miss malaysia?? oh, yeah. i do. still. i miss my friends, home and malaysian food. but what is there to complain when my parents will be here with me on the 1st raya? to abe n kak aini, jangan jeles!!! hahah! insyaAllah next year we will celebrate raya together as a family ok! I MISS YOU!!!!!! both of you!!! muah muah!!

p/s: selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin to everyone. may we get the opportunity to meet ramadhan again next year. be sure to drive or be driven carefully on the road. love all of u to pieces!!! last but not least, I MISS............... everything la!! heheh.. muahXXxx! *hugS*

PM to Actress to Engineer =)

2010-08-31T15:35:00.009+09:00

what does 31st August mean to us Malaysians? i guess there could only be one answer: it's our beloved country's Independence Day!!! YEY!

so no matter where we are, we can still have the mutual feeling for our country. (oh, minus those who are racist, i guess they don't understand what independence really mean >.<) well, i am not that patriotic, but deep inside my heart i know i appreciate my country so much. from money to food, clothes and education, my country has directly or indirectly give me all these necessities in making me who i am right now. not that i am anybody. YET. hahaha! so it's not wrong to aim high, right? =P

speaking of being somebody, i remember how i used to have so many ambitions when i was young. just name it, lawyer, doctor, accountant, all of those above have crossed my mind so many times. some people may say i am a confused child, (huh, how rude!) but my father has always told us that it is better to have more than one ambition than not having any.

but being an astronaut?? NEVER! hahah

i have once dreamt of being a prime minister. the first lady! oh no, not as the wife of prime minister, but the PM itself!! also, on the other hand, i have always been interested in acting, that some part of me wanted to be an actress. aiming for a movie star might be a little bit high though. =P a theatre actress does sound appealing to me. no matter what i be, i just wanted to perform. yep, be it on stage or in tv. i just love to be the center of attraction. (senyap! jangan sebut capab!)

so that's why i guess people call these dreams as 'angan angan mat jenin.' now i end up studying something verrrryy different from what i initially planned. something that doesn't need to do social work that much. i am now en route to be... an engineer? InsyaAllah! and guess what? i just love every single thing that i am doing. from doing the brain-cracking programmings to doing various experiments on many data do not seem to affect my desire to become a successful engineer.

i guess no matter how or who u turn out to be, be sure that it is for the best of yourself and of course, for the country! i may not be the prime minister who needs to do every single thing for the country, or an actress who performs on Istana Budaya's stage performing some Malaysian theater, but i hope to be a useful engineer to everyone. well, not now, but someday in the future. YEAH, with the spirit of independence day lets hope that we can be someone useful to our beloved country! =)

i feel so merdeka because i have just finished my 3rd presentation today~~~ weeee~~~ lets countdown for my parents' visit to japan! another 8days to go!!! LALALALA~ i'm on top of the world now! ^^

have i mentioned that i love my labmates?

2010-07-02T01:53:00.002+09:00

there's just something about these japanese people that i really admire:
- they are very serious in their work. once they have put their minds into something, there's just no way out. they will finish them up and do their best for it.

i have been quite busy these few days as i need to get ready for my presentation this coming tuesday. as the most junior student in the lab, it is a norm to seek help from our seniors. since i am also a foreigner, i desperately need help especially this time around i have to translate an english thesis to japanese.

definitely not a simple task. T___T

so today i have finished writing my worksheet and asked my senior to check it for me. i was rather disappointed as he had some work to finish up that he said he could not check it for me by today. all i could do was to give an understanding nod n prayed he would finish his work quickly.

i was so surprised when suddenly my friend who needs to prepare for a very important interview tomorrow has offered to check my worksheet. GOD! isn't he sweet??? i was so touched by his kindness and couldn't thank him enough for his help. =)

well, there are still a lot more to do, but i can breathe properly now as i know that my worksheet is understandable. well, not yet perfect, but still~ hehe... anyway, to make my day more interesting, my pray was answered and this senior of mine who is in charged of me had finished up his work and came to offer his help.

and guess what! not only one, but 2 seniors came to my rescue and tried to help out with my work.
(note that one of them is very good looking. HAHAHAHAH)

the contents of the thesis is rather difficult, i might say myself. many things need to be understood and needless to say, a lot of research need to be done. and just imagine, they stayed there and did some research together with me, besides checking my spellings and grammar. they did their best to understand every bit of the contents that i just couldn't bring myself to say 'I'M EXHAUSTED. I WANNA GO HOME.'

i could just imagine if i were to get help from the malays, they won't be as determined as these japanese. (no offence though)

at that time i was so hungry. i haven't eaten anything since i left home but i just couldn't let them finish my work without me being there. seriously i was more worried for my senior because he needed to catch his train back home before 10.30pm. (SEE!! how unselfish of them!!! sangat terharu okayh!! >.<) finally at 10.10pm we made our move and locked the lab. i am just mentally tired and feel like sleeping. (but i can still afford to write an entry, hehe).

heh, can't help thinking that if i continue being busy like this, in no time i can be skinny!

oh, FINE. maybe not skinny. but losing some weight IS possible. HAHAHAH ;)

zap me back to reality

2010-06-23T00:00:00.000+09:00

neither

A - B - R - A - C - A - D - A - B - R - A
A - B - R - A - C - A - D - A - B - R
A - B - R - A - C - A - D - A - B
A - B - R - A - C - A - D - A
A - B - R - A - C - A - D
A - B - R - A - C - A
A - B - R - A - C
A - B - R - A
A - B - R
A - B
A

nor

hocus pocus

nor

alakazem

can bring me back to malaysia (obviously!) T.T

i have to get a grip of myself and start working hard on my daily routine in JAPAN. yeah, enough already with the bridesmaid story. in 2 weeks' time i will be up front, again, not as a bridesmaid, ( DUH! ) but to present my work to the whole labmates. which means: busy days ahead!!! needless to say, working at the lab even on weekends. agghhh!!!! BARBITURATE in need here... anyone? anyone??

the only thing i can do now is to look forward to the days ahead after the presentation. =)

1. futsal with dearest labmates
-probably i will only warm the bench and take pictures as i am the only girl. SIGH!

2. meet up with besties in tokyo
- nothing can compare to girls' talk at a coffee show and pillow talk before going to sleep with the ones you can really trust. hehe.... pekah, jua~~ can't wait to see the both of u!!!!

3. raya with the loved ones, ie beloved parents
- oh well, skip august and come quick september!! i want to meet my parents!! since im not going to celebrate raya in malaysia this year, i'm bringing malaysia to japan. hehe... which means....... my parents are coming to my place!! =))

these are all not confirmed yet, but how lovely if everything goes as planned. at the time being, all i have to do is to work hard this 2 weeks for my presentation. please pray for me and hope that my smile doesn't fade away from this face. =)

fifa world cup 2010

2010-06-11T10:54:00.005+09:00

the world cup is starting today!!! after waiting for 4 whole years, and i can watch the games here. here. here at home, from MALAYSIA!!!

hey, u know what, even i myself still can't believe that i am now in malaysia. and i just went to pasar malam yesterday with my family. OMG! is this really a dream? only last tuesday i was in the seminar room, refraining myself from sleeping, listening to my researchmates doing their presentation, and just a few nights before, i was hanging out with afia and izzat singing at the top of our lungs at super jankara. =)
(refer to their blogs for more details on our night out!)

so what's the catch this time? what am i doing in malaysia at THIS time around? am i here just to watch football at mamak stalls with other malaysians while drinking teh tarik?? or maybe to watch lagenda budak setan at TGV or GSC?

yeahhhh right!! as if~ :D

so, the whole reason i'm here in the cosy tv room watching GLEE on star world, is to wait for this sunday! for my sister's wedding reception which i am going to be the bridesmaid!! can you get the whole idea already? i am flown here in the middle of the semester to take care of my sister on her special day. and that makes me feel special... (hoi, yang kahwin kakak ko la fiqah... >.< ye2, paham2)

to those who get confused, my sister is already married last december, and this time around is only the reception. =)

okie dokie, i shall be back to update on the reception soon!! hope everything goes smoothly and be the best day for the newly weds.

from the bottom of my heart

2010-05-31T19:27:00.004+09:00

okayhhhh~~ so everyone has been reminding and torturing me indirectly (yeah, the look you all have been giving me....) for not updating my blog. i really am sorry for being so quiet (me? quiet?) for almost 3-4months.

please believe me, since i entered my 4th year, i have been pretty busy with my lab and all. especially during the preparation for my 1st presentation which finished exactly just a week ago, i got this feeling that i was the most hardworking creature on earth. i went to the lab even on weekends and only got back home during isyak. *clap clap*

i feel sorry to those who witnessed my tense and the ugly-sour-grape face. ugh... >.<

but don't get me wrong. being a final year student doesn't mean i am deprived of the best things of the world. just ask people around me, i am sure they are getting bored of me telling them about my lab stories. non-stop. (izyan, ashfa, kak adil, akachan... sure korang paham... hahahaha)

hehe, yeah... this is indeed my best year in japan. i believe it's still not too late to love japan right? you know that you love something when you couldn't stop talking about it. trust me, i've tried so hard to keep my mouth shut and stop making people bored listening to my stories, but oh well, i guess that just shows how much i love my labmates.

if i ever update my blog these past 3 months, i am sure i will flood my blog with my lab stories... :D

right, i shall be back with some updates. wait for me will ya? ;)

wedding videos!!! =)

2010-02-09T02:30:00.001+09:00

what?? afiqah! you are still too young to think about marriage.

yeah yeah... i know. it's not time yet!

so people, please don't get any weird ideas just because i'm in a mood to watch wedding videos. =P

actually my seniors and i have always been like 'ooh' and 'aaah' everytime we watch wedding videos on youtube. especially when we get together in kak izzah's room... (macam aktiviti berhantu di hujung2 minggu la plak >.<)

starting yesterday, i have been watching one after another wedding videos because my sister's wedding video has been uploaded on the facebook!! to those who want to watch the videos, just click at the link below, but don't forget to log into your facebook account first. =)

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=289445663850&oid=56217786716

and

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=289445663850&oid=56217786716#!/video/video.php?v=290038403850&oid=56217786716

i just love wedding videos. they seem so nice and memorable. but only one thing lacking in these 2 videos: there are not many video shots of me !!!!!!!!!! T________T

anyway, credit to dinawedding! you all did a good job! and i just can't wait to see the pictures by nazimzafri. ^^

oh, speaking of videos, i have also been watching some videos on kuala lumpur. (initially i was searching for seoul videos to inspire me on my upcoming trip to seoul this weekend, and only god knows how i ended up watching videos of kuala lumpur.)
it is interesting to watch the videos uploaded by the tourists who came to malaysia. many of them use chinese and indian songs in their video clips. see, this is the proof of how malaysia can be truly asia!

and there is one particular video which is much weirder. it is a video of kuala lumpur with a thai song in it! i wonder why this person used thai song. he might have got confused between a malay and a thai song.hehe, who knows. anyway, the video is still cute though!

p/s: happy birthday kak wan!! dah tua laaa!!! gonna miss u bila dah balik msia nanti........ *sobs*

banoffee pie specially made for u! haha, the last touch was a bit messy. sorry!!

celebrating with kak izzah, akachan, me, kak wan, kak ayu and kak adil =)

oops i did it again

2010-01-31T14:19:00.000+09:00

did i mention about not spending anymore money? not if i want to enjoy my trip to korea and london?

haih.... so yesterday was the perfect weather for an evening walk. yes, i was only aiming to get some sun, and for the sake of walking. yeah, for health. nothing more. and moreover, i knew well enough that today would be cloudy and raining all day long. so i took the opportunity and wore my best shoes, and there i was, walking on the street of sannomiya.

from one street to another, i kept on walking without even blinking or thinking twice of stopping in any shops. i was so proud of myself that for the first 3 and a half hours i was doing nothing except brisk walking PAST THROUGH the shops. i also took the route which i have never been to, and somehow i ended up in kobe.

i contacted kak izzah and we promised to meet up at a particular food court in kobe to have dinner together that night (seriously i was craving for bukkake udon for quite some time). so, while i was on my way there, i walked myself into some shops and also supermarkets just to kill time. seriously, if people ever looked at me, they would right away know that i wasn't in a mood of buying anything particular. yeah, i went into the supermarkets without even bother to take a basket with me, and in every shops i entered, i just walked past through everything and my hands were practically in my pockets most of the time. i was really refraining myself from looking at gorgeous items.

just when i thought i would make a move and reached the food court successfully without lending my hands on anything, my eyes just had to land on a coat. just, right before i could step away from the shop. and i couldn't breathe properly, not because i was so hungry, but because i was so happy to see the coat which i was just about to buy in saitama 2 weeks ago, but ended up not buying it because i thought i didn't need anymore coats. and so i thought! i realized that i regretted not buying it the minute i left the shopping complex. T_T

i am not trying to justify for my actions, but please understand that it was like a dream come true. i knew at that time that i just had to buy it!! who would want to miss a second chance. oh no, at least not me! so i did what i had to do. i grabbed the coat, tried it once, and the moment i looked myself into the mirror i knew at once. i must have the coat. hating to make a second mistake, i quickly took the coat with me, took out my purse and went to the cashier to pay for it.

i was surprised that the girl at the counter gave me a blank look. she showed me the card,
and it was my bank card. >.<
ok, i was probably too excited to make the payment. sheepishly i took the bank card from her and handed over my credit card. (HAHAHAHAH! mongoks, wat maluuuu je)

right after getting off the shop, i saw a missed call from kak izzah. whoa! and at that moment i realized. ooooopssss, i did it again!!!!!!!!!! wasn't i suppose not to buy anyting anymore???

and i thought that for a change my will power was strong enough, not to buy anything while going out. DAMN!

well, at the bright side, at least i got the coat i longed for. :D

it's all about the money~

2010-01-27T14:09:00.008+09:00

i dont know what have kept me busy lately, while everyone else is so busy studying for their respective exams. i don't have any exams to sit for this time around, so i am considered free and so much time on my hands. but i wonder myself, why cant i bring myself to write any entry for this blog??? huhu~~you know the answer: just bloody lazy i guess T_T

anyway, i have been going up and down, visiting my friends and also being visited by a friend. yeah, my holiday mood is already here. much earlier than the rest. i have bought my tickets to korea, going back home and also to my sister's place! yippee! (yeah, i know.... again...... can't help it because i just love going to london... hehe :D )

with mimi who gave a surprise visit to kobe! ;)

in saitama having a great time with jua, jimu n rina ^^

3 fiqahs in gunma! syafiqah, afiqah n afiqah =)

but oh, it doesn't look so heavenly actually. i have calculated and happily thought i have enough money, or more accurately, enough cash to bring along to korea and to the UK. but how wrong i was!! just yesterday i checked my bank account and got shocked to realize that my money is soOo much less than what i have seen a few days ago.

yeah! please laugh at me for how stupid i was to forget i have used my credit card to buy 2 tickets to korea, and then some. HUWAAA~~~~ how am i supposed to enjoy myself without having enough cash?? okay, i might be exaggerating, but as much as i hate being calculative, i just need to be, starting from today onwards. while doing my groceries, i cant help but to compare the price of everything. huhu, even 40yen means so much to me. (kat kantin sekolah dulu tuh dah boleh makan nasi lemak + keropok + air 50sen okayyhh!)

huh, i was totally spacing out yesterday on my way out to sannomiya after looking at the account. (dah la duit dari jpa masuk lambat!! huwaaaaaa!!!) i just followed where my feet had to bring me to. huuhuhuh.... sob3.... okay, from now on i guess i can only be seen in my house. haih, no eating outside and seriously, no shopping at the moment. damn, that's tough. >.<

okay, now i have done my job. hahah! writing a blog on how sad one's life is without money.
so, any suggestions on what kind of activity that doesn't require much money?
and any ideas on where i can get instant cash without working part time? robbing a bank? err, anyone wants to give backup? and no, i'm NOT selling my tickets to bsb concert for cash. hahah!

the ones i love =)

2010-01-13T22:25:00.010+09:00

weird though, but up till today i still can't believe that my sister is already married. time sure flies that sometimes i feel that we are still kids studying at home under the surveillance(wow) of ayah and mami where by the 3 of us (abang, kak aini and i) can't wait for 10pm. at 10 pm sharp we would be happily or rather groggily go to ayah and mami's room to salam and say goodnight before going to bed.

i don't know about other siblings, but mine definitely love to reminisce our good old days. we always remind each other about the siblings power and share a good laugh on how funny we were during those days. abang with his temper, kak aini always trying to irritate others, and me, with my high-pitch voice. well, i guess there is one good thing about time. at least we are now much more mature than before. (please agree with me~~ hahaha)

i can still remember when i was 5, as usual we would go to the playground in front of our house to play in the evening. there were 2 boys who were older than i was, trying to bully me by using some violence. they pulled and squeezed my hands so hard that i screamed equally as hard. in a few seconds my siblings came rushing and saved me. they practically threw and kicked the *** of those boys. pheww~ i sure am glad i have such powerful voice. ;) well, i can never forget how my brother and sister have helped me a lot, protecting her little sister from danger all this while. :')

though we often quarrel, i believe that we will always be there for each other.

abang will always be a big brother to me. being positive towards things, he definitely makes me feel good towards life. if the situation ever gets gloomy, he really knows how to change it into a happier mood. trust me, kids just love to be around my brother because sometimes he acts like them too... heheheheheheh... and being athletic, no doubt he is the one who makes me so into basketball. i guess i love taekwondo because of him too. =)

kak aini, the quiet one. yeah right, she might appear quiet, but she is never a boring person. to the elderly, she is very polite and always on the move in everything. she is very helpful which i totally respect her for that. she might also look serious, but trust me, when she laughs, please turn off your speaker. hurm, she also dresses herself very well that i tend to follow her style in almost every way. heheh.. just about a few minutes ago i got some tips on dressing myself up by her through skype. hurm, see how lucky i am to have a sister like her. :D

anyway, no matter how time has passed and the fact that we are getting older, i trust that our bond will always stay strong. although kak aini is now married, and abang's wedding tah2 just around the corner, (who knows?heheh) i know that our love towards each other will never end.

to kak aini, i guess it is not too late if i wanna congratulate you again here. be a good wife, and respect your husband ok! like what we malays always say: semoga berbahagia ke anak cucu!! =)

i have got another brother now! ;D

p/s: congrats shera for the great news! really happy for you~ to ema and shera, i wish the both of you the best in the future life ie married life! (x lame lagi)... muahxXx! <3

reporting from hong kong

2009-12-25T15:17:00.006+09:00

sleepless night.

yeah, i had one last night. normally i have no problem getting to sleep, but yesterday was a different story. all my senses and organs worked perfectly well. i mean, overly well and beyond their needs. okay, let me explain.

my eyes had captured all the lights it could possibly capture and i could see everything perfectly clear in the dark gray night.

my ears had successfully sensed all the voices and noises which i cant normally hear during the days. i could hear every single motorcycles that passed my apartment, the footsteps of my neighbours,the cracking sounds of the windows, the water leaking from outside the window, the clock ticking (damn, it was annoying. it was consistently ticking. i mean, every single second!...... oh, i forgot that it was called a clock >.<).

my skin felt as dry as my lips and my throat.

my nose was breathing in cold air which wasn't comforting at all.

my heartbeat was faster than usual. (i could almost here my own heartbeat).

my stomach was growling like mad. ( oh dearie little tummy, didn't u just have a buffet for dinner?? what else could u be wishing for??............nasi beriyani.......)

and most of all, my brain was at the most productive state, if i must say. it had been giving me loads and loads of flashbacks, dreams, hopes, memories and everything. oh, i even decided that i should try being a wakil rakyat when i grow up. (whoa, at the most weird time, and all of a sudden i got a new ambition??? baaaah!!)

ok, so it was yesterday night's story. a sleepless night christmas eve. like seriously, i only had maybe 15 minutes of sleep. anyhow, now, im in hong kong, transiting for malaysia. feeling completely different. fully energetic, extremely excited, anxious, and so looking forward for............tomorrow!!!!! my sister's wedding. in half an hour, my flight is departing to malaysia!! weeee~~~

p/s: merry Christmas to all my christian friends!!!!

p/p/s; happy birthday mala!!!!! my bff!!!!

p/p/p/s: thanks to my lovely neighbours, izyan and ashfa for the wake up messages. i was still quite wide awake when izyan's msg came in. hehehe. when i got ashfa's msg at 5.10am, i was neither here nor there. and i only woke up when suddenly one of my alarms went: 'gemuuuuuk!! banguuuun!!!!! gemuuuuk!!! gemuuuuk!!!!' >.<

ok.... that's my brother's voice. i've been using it as my alarm for almost a year now. huhu, abe, please be proud. though you are always so faraway, i practically hear your voice everyday!!! heheh ;)

p/p/p/p/s: oh, and of course, happy holidays everyone!!!!! (can anybody tell me what p/s actually means???)

blogging off!

how do you like your winter?

2009-12-18T12:40:00.012+09:00

i kinda disliked winter when i was in my first year in japan. i hardly survived outside or even inside my house. wonder why? because i had no heater of my own at that time. there is only one heater/aircond inside my housemate's room. we just moved into our present house and at that time i was so determined to wait for a hand-me-down heater from my senior who would be leaving for malaysia in a few months from then.

yeah, call me cheapskate. T_T served me right for being one as i had the worst winter of my life. i wore just as thick inside and outside the house. i would be wrapping myself with mofus and futons and swinging myself back and forth, having my hands under my armpits, while sitting on the floor of my housemate's room, trying very hard to focus on my studies. at times i would be hugging a jug of hot water to warm myself up. heh, by the time i poured the water into the cup, it was no longer hot. >.<

so now, i feel more at ease having my own heater. (oh, it is actually from my senior... ;P) no more hugging hot jugs, sleepless nights and mofus and futons all over my body. and the great thing is, i am getting more positive towards winter.

i like winter because.......

i do not have to worry about my clothings! no point wearing cute blouses as they can't be seen through the thick coats. all i have to do is to have more variety of coats/winter clothings. i very much enjoy this because i am too lazy to iron my clothes. or even my tudungs! you will see me wearing more pashminas than normal tudung during this season due to my laziness! LOL

so, how do you like your winter?

i hope you like yours coz i definitely like mine! =)

winter in the UK

2nd year winter in ebina

hello and goodbye

2009-12-07T19:48:00.008+09:00

i can still remember
the day we met
i smiled and you smiled
we exchanged hellos
so much we talked about
suddenly it was time for bed

days and months and even years passed
we were so close
people thought we were inseparable
you gave me strength
i gave you hope
we supported each other
even we thought we were inseparable

no matter how dark
and how gloomy some days were
our friendship was alive and bright
that everyday looked shiny and full of light
the spark in our eyes showed
you cared for me
and i wanted the best for you

nevertheless
hellos will always end with goodbyes
it was equally hard for the both of us
well, who are we to decide
as all that we could do
was to stay forever in each other's heart

now
i am here you are there
though things are different in many ways
i'm hoping you are fine in everything you do
and i am pretty sure
you are thinking the same way too

this one goes to all my friends whom i miss so much! (if you think i miss you, then this is definitely dedicated to you. ;P)

a big THANK YOU to you.... yeah, YOU!

2009-11-27T23:40:00.002+09:00

i know i should be sleeping by now. but i just dont feel like going to bed yet. too many happenings and yet i havent updated my blog as i am supposed to do. feeling a little bit worried and at the same time feeling bad for abandoning my blog, i decided to be here. yeah, writing a little something. at least. (but i guess it could turn out to be a very long post.... oh well, who cares. hehe)

so yesterday was my birthday, and today, is our hari raya haji!! salam eidul adha to all mulims in the whole world!!! =)

actually, before my birthday, seriously i felt a bit depressed at home as i just got back from a quite long and laid back holiday with my girlfriends in saitama and also a night in tokai. thanks to my ever good friends, jua, pekah n shera for spending ur time with me!!!! and yeah, not forgetting jimu and apek! it really was quite a holiday. 5 great days!! ^___^

those lovely days really meant a lot to me as as at that time i had a really strong reason just to be out of kobe. hahaha! and it really turned out to be one of the best holidays ever. the moment i arrived at jua's place, i was soOo surprised to be celebrated with a candled birthday cake. awww.... that was real sweet of u guys to prepare such surprise. :')

huda, jua, me n pekah at jua's place~

i dont think i will write too much as what ive mentioned earlier on, that blog doesnt actually work as a diary. i guess what i really wanna say is that, im just like everyone else: that i am easily touched with some simple words, sincerity and care that others show for me.

sometimes it may appear too random that out of nowhere someone ure not even closed to suddenly write on your wall at facebook wishing u happy birthday. however, im telling u, they have really really made my day. receiving more than a hundred wishes, presents from them whom i really appreciate and surprises after surprises can make me feel appreciated, and even better, i feel im loved by people around. =P (oh, saya tak gedik ok!)

it really doesnt matter to me at what time people wish me, whether it is too early or too late, i feel so warm inside, getting those sweet words. and of course, this eidul adha also makes me realised how the muslims can unite. it touches my heart looking at muslims in kobe whom are not that many can make the effort to gather in the mosque in the morning to perform eidul adha prayer. it's such a good view to look at. shaking hands and giving salam to each other, it does make people feel connected to each other.

muslims in kobe after prayer. really great weather =)

malaysians who went to the mosque =P

hurmmmm.... what am i babbling here?? so yeah, by now everyone can understand well enough that these past few days have been really great. with great people always being there for u, great moments can never be erased.

all i could say is, THANK YOU you lovely people for continuing making my days as precious as you all are to me. :')

lets not be too secretive shall we? ;)

2009-11-11T18:41:00.004+09:00

some people love to be the center of attraction, while some people just enjoy a sit-back-and-relax kind of life. i guess at many times i may appear as someone who loves all the attention, but seriously, as far as i love the attention *ehem*, there are also times when i prefer to be a silent watcher from afar.

it really is interesting getting to know many kinds of people. however, the one type of people whom up until today, i can't totally figure out is the ones that prefer being mysterious. WHOA! sounds scary huh? T_T
oh, no no no. not that kind of mysterious! what i really mean is those who are too secretive. i repeat, TOO secretive.

yeah yeah i know. it is not wrong to be secretive, especially when everyone has something, well at least a little something to hide from others. i may have some secrets too (seriously, i do??) which i don't wish to share with people. anyway, what annoys me the most is when it is not even at all a secret, but since they want to appear mysterious, they tend to give unsatisfying explanations when having conversations with others. i guess, rather than claiming they have great and interesting life, (which they MIGHT have, who knows?) they just love making people in puzzles and expecting that people might check them out for some reason. HAHAHAHAH! oh come on, as if people have that much time to be that interested in their lives. at least not me. =P

i am not pinpointing to anyone, but i happen to know a lot of people who have these kind of habits. it can really irritate me to the max. can't people just be more straight-forward, more honest and more communicative so that no misunderstandings could be created? if you are asked, 'is it important?' could you please give a straight answer such as, 'yes', if you feel it is important to you. don't reply as 'im not sure' or any kind of confusing answers. it is also funny when people can reply with only one sentence, or sometimes, one word when being asked something. can't they at least tell and give more information so that people do not have to ask so many times. people might misunderstand and what's worse, people can sometimes get really worried of you because of your too-little information.

i understand well enough that not everyone is born expressive, but at least i hope people could think of what kind of situation others might be in because of their mysterious selves. if you are naturally a mysterious person, i guess it's fine. but please do not do it just to get on others' nerves.

aku-kau versus kita-awak

2009-11-07T02:35:00.003+09:00

a few days ago, i logged into my facebook account, and there it was.

a friend request.

no friends in common, no mutual friend at all.

well, normally in this kind of situation, i will just click ignore and never again here about the person.

but this time, it's a bit different. i clicked accept, and wallaa~ in a second, she and i are friends. as simple as that. well, the reason i accepted her as my friend is that i remember her name well enough to know who she is. she is no other than my really good friend from primary school. due to the excitement, the adrenaline rush took over me, and before i knew it, i had written something on her wall.

'izni~ halu! thanks 4 the add. waaa~~ aku ingat ko lagi :P ingat ke aku? =)'

only after writing on her wall i realised that i used the term 'aku-kau' with her. as far as i can remember, i never used the word 'aku-kau' with my friends back in primary school. i normally used 'kita-awak' with everyone. hahahhha!! yeah2, i know. so cute, eh? *wink*

however, i was so relieved when she also replied with 'aku-kau'. heheh.... i guess no one uses 'kite-awak' anymore once people enter the secondary school, no? i really can't remember since when i got used to the term 'aku-kau', and when the last time i used 'kite-awak' with people. heheh... how i missed those days!

it can get really difficult adjusting with people on which word to use. with different people, we tend to use different terms. i hate when i forgot which pronoun i use with some people.

hurrmmm..... what do you do when you got stuck and don't know which one to use?

pening sudey~~ >.<

31st october =)

2009-11-02T01:54:00.003+09:00

31 st october is Halloween for some people.

but for me, it is a much bigger and important date, i.e my parents' anniversary!!!

so, on the 31st October of this year, my parents celebrated their 27th anniversary. weheew~ again, i wanna wish, congrats and happy anniversary ayah n mummy!!! =) you are the best parents and the cutest pair in the whole wide world! im really proud to be your daughter, and i really really hope that your 3 children will have blessed marriage like yours! amiiiin!!

sad though, that i wasn't at home to wish the both of you directly. T_T all i could do was to celebrate Halloween with my friends, instead. haha!

guess what? we ( jua, pekah, atil, hanizah n i) celebrated Halloween at the Universal Studio of Japan in Osaka. as we all know, the Japanese don't really celebrate Halloween, but i was quite surprised how it turned out to be. we took more pictures with those who were in halloween costumes rather than with the universal characters themselves.

boy, we really had fun!! we took hundreds of picture that day. no, i'm not exaggerating here. we really did, take hundreds of pictures. how can we not, we were there even before the gate was opened, till it was closed again. hahahahahah!!!

for more info of our visit there, you better visit atil's blog on happy halloween. http://zatieaqmar.blogspot.com/2009_11_01_archive.html
sorry atil for exposing ur blog to the world! hehe, u wouldn't mind would you? ;) *wink*

ayah, mami, i miss the both of you so much, that i wanna dedicate this song to the both of you! muahxXX! =)

weird dream

2009-10-25T22:04:00.005+09:00

have u ever had weird dreams? hurm, i had one yesterday. maybe i had lotsa things on my mind last night. yeah, that must be it. >.<

i always have more than one dream at one night. so yesterday one of the wildest dream is that someone back from school told me......

that.....
.

.

.

.

.

.

i had actually got married to him?

in other words, i am his WIFE!!!

WTH?

that.... is....... just..... so..... stupid!!! so absurd!!!!!! aaghhhh, ridiculous!!!

and i can actually remember the procedures of how i agreed to be his wife in that dream. it was soOo weird. i even remember screaming out of depression. (yeah, depressed because i have a husband... whom i have forgotten. yeah, so stupid... duh~) but i guess i didnt scream for real as i asked my housemate this morning and she didnt remember hearing me screaming... huh~ that's a relief.

weird dream, weird people, weird places and most of all, the weirdest timing.

though i had many things on my mind last night, i dont remember thinking of getting married. T_T
must be in the excitement of my sister's upcoming wedding. and ended up, i am the one getting cold feet...??

again, WEIRD.

* oh, also, yesterday night i dreamt of having growing eyelashes. i cut them with scissors but they grew even longer like hair. they grew so fast that i freaked out. i could see them growing even when i looked into the mirror. it was so hard for me to wear my tudung. seriously.
nothing is funny about that. it was damn SCARY. T_T

my sister is officially engaged! weheww~

2009-10-19T21:03:00.006+09:00

oh my God, oh my God, OH MY GOD!

come on, just tell me how can i not be excited??
my sister just got engaged yesterday!!! and only god knows how happy and excited i am for her!
well, she wasn't actually at home when the rombongan meminang came to our house yesterday, so the engagement ring is not on her finger, but it is still safely placed in the box. =)
(tunjuk kotak je la eh, cincin dalam kotak tu... heheh =P)

hurm, now i am more than ever looking forward to go home for this winter holiday. for what?? u should get a hint already. for my sister's wedding!! i had a tough time with myself thinking a way how to get back this winter holiday as the wedding is on the 26th of december, and u know what? i will be having my experiment on the 25th? damn!! it's so annoying, ok! (plus,it is on christmas.... geez). i've tried to look for a suitable ticket so i won't miss my own sister's wedding. but it is practically impossible to get a ticket on the 25th, night, after i finish off the experiment. grrrr....
i went crazy for almost weeks thinking of the situation.

well, i did what i could do.

knock knock knock

so i knocked the door n finally i got to meet my sensei. he was at his desk when i knocked, and he jumped out of his chair when he saw me.

'do u have got some time sensei?'

he looked concerned and walked towards me, wondering what could be so important that an international student was there meeting him out of the blue.

after explaining the circumstances, and telling that kak aini is getting married on the 26th of december, he still looked calm.

'it's ok, i don't think it will be any problem if u were to miss only one class.'

'are u sure? is it ok for me to buy my tickets now?'

'yeah, please do.'

huh? that simple?

hahaha! i couldnt help smiling. and i almost cheered in front of him. well, but i could still control it. and guess what? ive bought my tickets~!!!!! alhamdulillah!!!!! =)))))))

(yang tak tau, nih tepak sireh namanye... hahah! =) )

raya can also be tiring =D

2009-10-15T09:35:00.010+09:00

raya fever is still here.

well, if you know what i mean. just take a look at your facebook account and you can see that most of the highlights are still on hari raya. so, just like everyone else, i am myself having fun in kobe too! without further ado, let me present to you some video of ours~ ^_~

actually i have compiled all the videos together, but it took me forever just to upload the video. sigh! so, you just have to watch the videos seperately. for the compiled video, click here http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/video/video.php?v=168303673752&ref=mf

yeah, like what u can probably see, our university is situated on the hill. hoo~ very tiring yet the view from up there is worth it!

lastly~ say cheese everyone~!!

yes, i DO love kobe very much! =)

imagine if you could meet your younger self...

2009-10-09T11:12:00.007+09:00

everything happens for a reason. but i wonder what it is this time? will i give a second chance to those who were outright rude and got so emotional for some weird reasons? haha! i don't know about that.

but really, as much as i do love my life right now, there are still a few things that i regret in doing. such as, sucking my thumb up till standard 6? hahaha! i got all my teeth wired up and i had to go to the dentist for the rest of my secondary school. i used to make faces when my my friends called me betty (from yo soy betty la fia). hurm, but then again.... i think i like wearing braces! not many people got the opportunity to have colours on their teeth! =D

ok, so i don't exactly regret sucking my thumbs. hehe... well, what i really regretted is to have spent my time wastefully with those who can't appreciate my existence. duh~ why bother anyway? and i guess i will regret even more if i were to give them second chance and then, they start doing it all over again.

i am currently reading ' Who's That Girl?' by Alexandra Potter. it's about Charlotte Marryweather who got the chance to meet her ten years younger self! and there were a lot of advices she would give to her self. it's really funny and to those who love chic lit kinda novels, please read this one, ok!

if i got the chance to meet my younger self:

1) i will definitely ask myself to learn how to cook proper meals. staying very far away from home really makes me feel less healthy by not eating nutritious food. luckily i have a housemate here. it makes my life much easier, if u know what i mean! =P

2) i will ask myself to jump a lot more so that i'll get taller. 158cm? man, i'm so short! >.<

3) i will remind myself to take a lot more videos of my life. now i regret for not remembering a lot of things in the past. or maybe i would ask myself to write diaries. huhu, only now i realise the importance of it!

4) surely i'll make more time with my family and express my gratitude and love for them even more! ^^

5) i will make sure i choose the right person to get closed to. not some passers by whom i don't really know. there is no such thing like instant best friends right? to my real best friends, you are the best! =)

6) hurm.... i can't think of anything else.

hahah! i must have felt contented with my life. actually, i really have not much to regret as this is the ideal and best life i have ever wished for. i love my life as it is, and nothing can change that. =)

express your love

2009-10-01T23:30:00.000+09:00

good night yah, good night mi, i love you! see you tomorrow. tata titi tutu!

those are the exact words i used to say when i was small. every night before i went to bed, i would hug and kiss my parents good night. actually right to this age, i still say those words if i am in malaysia with them. hurm, now i am back in japan after almost 2 months of holiday with my family. i feel ever so grateful to have such lovable and caring parents. though i felt sad to get separated from them that night at the airport, i still felt good to get to hug and kiss them goodbye.

there are just some people who would feel ashamed to express their love for their family in public. yet for me, i am glad that i can express mine freely without feeling ashamed to do so.

i miss my family so much! i hope time flies that i can go back and hug and kiss them goodnight each and everyday.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

2009-09-23T23:02:00.001+09:00

selamat hari raya to everyone!!! huhu, this may sound quite weird, but i somehow feel the wish 'selamat hari raya, maaf zahir batin' doesn't sound nice anymore.

why?

well, it simply because everyone wishes the same thing to everyone nowadays. they look like just some fixed words that have been used since ages ago.

maaf zahir batin? hahah, i really hope we mean it when we use it. not just some yearly wish to everyone we kow.

anyhow, i just hope i am not too late to say selamat hari raya. since i am also just a human being, i am sure i have done a lot of mistakes in life. ampun dan maaf in every single thing that i have done or said wrongly to anyone. >.<

have a good hari raya everyone! =)

attention seeker

2009-09-10T21:25:00.004+09:00

i have learned my lesson. never again to enter klcc at 10 am sharp.

the moment i arrived at klcc, the doors were about to be opened. i entered from isetan and when i made my entrance, every salesperson in there was standing as if respecting the national anthem. well, there was a song played(must be the isetan song i guess). almost a hundred of them were standing up straight on a line, at the same time greeting me 'good morning' and giving me the most pleasant smile.

hooo~~ i felt like a vvip on the red carpet. i had to refrain myself from laughing! i was alone that i really didn't know what kind of expression to make at that time. all i could do was to smile back and replied 'good morning' to them. but i think it was more a grin than a smile.

i felt so relieved to make it through all the staff and most of all, succeeded to get out of isetan. fuh~

than i realised that i really couldn't take that much of attention.

hurmph, so much of an attention seeker i am. not anymore i guess! >.<

good things come to an end

2009-08-30T22:07:00.005+09:00

yeah, this is perfectly true. good things will always come to an end.

my sister is now on her way back to london. huu~ i will definitely miss her although insyaAllah in 4 months' time we will be meeting again. =)
starting tonight onwards, i will be back in my room sleeping alone.
no more gossiping before entering the other realm.
no more laughing at each other's stupid jokes.
and no more getting advices on our eating habits.

thanks sis for taking a good care of us when you were around! u are such a good doctor, u know that? gonna miss u loads!! all da best in your final year darl! muah2! have a safe journey to london. bon voyage~

*but of course, not all good things are coming to an end. i am now very excited to wait for my brother! abang, balik cepat! lawan iqa main basketball jom. ^.^

salam mubarak

2009-08-22T09:10:00.000+09:00

it's Ramadan again!!! =)

happy fasting everyone, and lets hope that this year's Ramadan is much better than the previous ones. again this year, insyaAllah i will be fasting the whole month in malaysia! weeheww!! so, to my friends out there who want to meet up or wish to break your fast together, contact me ok~! (budget artis kah!) you know how to contact me. ^.^

lets fill this month with lots and lots of ibadah. smoga Allah menerima segala amalan kita. amin~!

padang & bukittinggi trip

2009-08-19T18:20:00.000+09:00

since my sister and i are on holiday together, we use this opportunity to go on a vacation with my family. this time around, we planned to go somewhere different. yeah, padang and bukittinggi. besides to see the world, my father also wanted to visit some of the families there. hurm~ guess what, i am actually half, or maybe, a quarter minangkabau. heheh... oh~~ saya ada darah minang!!! =)

my father who was born in seremban, has once lived in bukittinggi for about 4 years. and till then, this was actually his first trip back to bukittinggi! our trip there was very memorable. we actually experienced big earthquakes and we were lucky that tsunami didn't happen. since padang is very near to the sea, it's not the earthquake that people are afraid of, but it is the tsunami. it was just an earthquake with 6.9 richter scale. (just ke tu?)

i love each and every moment spent there. i don't really feel like writing everything, so i think i'll just upload some photos and a video. a very low quality video though(bodoh2 je, sbb takde keje) :D

objek wisata cagar alam lembah anai air mancur

the delicious nasi padang! ;)

us, wearing the minang outfit at rumah gadang

my sister's catch of the day!!! sulam ayak! so pretty! =)

meeting ayah's cousin in padang

ayah's cousins and nieces in bukittinggi

that was close

2009-08-16T16:35:00.008+09:00

clinging sound of seat belts can be heard right after the landing announcement has been made. everyone is properly seated at their respective seats. i can feel the aircraft is descending and already on its way down. i take a look at the side window. the weather is really bad with heavy rain. in silence, i pray hard that nothing goes wrong to the aircraft. through the small window, i can already see the ground and the ocean vividly.

must be the indian ocean.

i close my eyes waiting anxiously for the landing. with my eyes shut, i can still see kuala lumpur very clearly in my head.

***************************

about 2 hours ago in kuala lumpur

all passengers to padang were already at boarding gate number 4, waiting to get on board. i glanced at my watch.

2.10pm.

we should have been flying off to padang but not a single sign of the gate to be opened soon. not much later, there was an announcement saying that our flight was delayed for about half an hour as the plane from padang had yet to arrive.

i smiled a bit.

yey! i am able to go to the ladies first. (lamo dah den tahan, sebab takut terlepas flight) :P

*******************************

i reopen my eyes when my body is taken aback. all of a sudden our plane is going upwards. this is not a landing, i tell myself. our aircraft makes a sudden sharp turn with a full speed. something is definitely not right. everyone else around me looks just as puzzled as i am. people are buzzing among themselves trying to figure out why. padang is becoming very small and slowly disappears from our sight. we are now again surrounded by dark clouds. a few moments later, our pilot's voice is heard.

'to all passengers, please keep calm. we are not able to land due to an earthquake that just happened in padang.'

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

alhamdulillah, we landed safely. it is such a good thing that our flight was delayed. also, i couldn't imagine an earthquake while landing. something bad could have happened for all we know. (oh, i don't even want to imagine it... *_*)

home sweet home

2009-08-10T09:27:00.003+09:00

hohoho..... i have been so busy with my exams in the previous month that i didn't have the chance to update my blog. oh, and now i am posting this entry at home from malaysia! yey! my summer holiday has started. =) and i am all smiles now....!!!

feel like updating a lot of stuff, but im just not mentally and physically ready for it. as i am not feeling really well since yesterday morning. oh malaysia, what do u have that japan doesn't, which can make me feel unwell.... haih~~

so, people out there. better drink a lot of water and please take a good care of yourself. or else, you will only spend your time in your room during the long waited holiday till you get better. sigh!

till then! =)

I am a cheapskate

2009-07-20T23:04:00.008+09:00

who likes free things? raise your hands! yeah, i do! well, in this case, i really am a cheapskate.

lately i tend to study at nearby cafes. i don't know why, but i just can't concentrate at home or even libraries. too much distractions at home, while libraries are so boring and too quiet. i fear i might easily pass out there. since i have no mp3 player, music played at the cafes can easily entertain my ears. even the smell of coffee makes me feel a lot fresher.

(gambar sekadar hiasan, saya bukan minum nescafe pun. :D)

however, i have to go to town to find suitable cafes(in my case, i go to sannomiya) for me to study. and whenever i get tired of studying, i tend to go to the best places where i can get free services. yeah!

like this evening, after almost 3 hours of sitting and studying, finally i got bored and decided to go to the nearest electrical shop. guess what... once i got there, straight away i went to the 4th floor. to the chair massager. (seriously,the only reason i went there was to get my body massaged.) 15 minutes of free massage and i was ready to face the world again. =)

my next stop was to the music shop to play the drum. oh, i am not at all an expert. i have only learned a few beats from my junior and that were all i have been playing all this while. (tuh pun kecoh. hahhaa...gaya je lebih cam pro... ye, saya poyo... T_T) seriously i didn't care what people around think of me whenever i play the drum. at one time people gathered to look my playing, but of course, only a few seconds later they went away. hahahah! don't ever get deceived by me. i managed to act like pro for about half an hour before i went to junkudo, a bookstore.

everytime i go there, i will read a few english story books for free. (mengaku cepat, semua orang pun penah buat! kan kan kan?) in malaysia, i always go to mph bookstores or kinokuniya in klcc whenever i have to wait for somebody. hurm, not a weird thing though, reading for free! at least it shows that we have a community of book lovers! LOL

lastly,before i started studying again, i looked through the new released cds and listened to the music using the headphones provided. i like looking for new nice songs just to look up in the internet. and once again, i save my money not buying the cds. :D

now, can you see what i meant by being a cheapskate? takde la teruk sangat kan! :P

you know it's hot when.....

2009-07-14T11:27:00.004+09:00

it's getting super hot as july has entered. i feel like melting on the road and have wild imaginations of being in the desert. not only we have to bare the heat of the fierce blazing sun, we also have to climb the hill everyday to make it to the university. reaching class is like the greatest success ever achieved.

the situation looks pretty much the same these days. everybody has the same expression on the face and pretty much the same thing on the mind. one word to describe it all: HOT!

yes! you know it's hot when:
1) you feel like taking a shower everytime you get home.
2) people are eating ice-creams as lunch.
3) all kind of insects are happily flying outside and also inside the house. they also tend to have tragic death on the roads. (yeah, dead centipedes and other gross creatures are always found dead on the way to kobe university.)
4) everyone holds extra accessory on the hand i.e the fan
5) extra smell in the class that can make you feel dizzy. ughhh
6) you feel like going out very early in the morning and get back only when the sun has set.
7) the fan in the room is never strong enough.
8) you get freaked out looking at yourself. yes, stripes like zebras. T_T

i can list hundreds more but let just say i have to study for my upcoming exams. heheh... 2 more weeks to go! and i'm having a hard time trying to study in my room as it's HOT! help!!!!!!!!!!

another month of patience

2009-07-07T22:45:00.005+09:00

weheeww~

exactly in one month's time i'll be heading home. oh dear malaysia, my beloved country, please wait for me! =) it surely makes anybody happy to be back with the beloved ones. but that also means............ my exams are just around the corner!!!
aaaaghh~~~!!!! why do we have to suffer before being happy.... huuu~~

so, yesterday, the exams' timetable was out. once the timetable is out, it practically means no more playing and start studying!! 7 papers to go, starts on the 27th july and finishes on the 5th of the following month. 2 weeks of seriousness and i just hope my face doesn't get cramp due to the lack of smile. (i look horrible without a smile on the face, yeah, i know T_T)

dear readers, please do your part as i will do mine... hahaha... ok2, i mean, i hope everyone can pray for my success. seriously, i really mean it this time. huhu... thank you in advance by the way ;)

life is what you make it

2009-06-30T22:22:00.004+09:00

it is nice to have such great company always by our side
it feels good to be accepted just as the way we are
it is great to have the time to create new memories, to venture new things and gain new experience
it means a lot to be appreciated on the things we have done

and isn't it a lot nicer for us to say how we really feel?
it feels greater to be truthful and it feels really good to get to say how much we care
and how much we appreciate the presence of the people around us
without them, we can't be what we are now...

i come to realise that other people play a big role in making who i am right now. i am very grateful to have each and every one of you in my life. no matter how small you may think your role is, it makes a big difference in my life.

to ayah, mami, abang and kak aini... you all are the heart and soul of my life. =)
to my friends, you are like the sunshine in my life.
and to everyone who has ever crossed my path, thank you for being a part of my life and give some spark into my life. ;)

love all of you to pieces

yup, i am as happy as this cat... hehe

**saje je meroyan takde keje... i miss my family a lot!! ayah mami, balik la malaysia cepat!**

camera and i

2009-06-28T20:43:00.016+09:00

i just love cameras. seriously i do. just bring a camera along, and i can entertain you all day long. =)

i do have my own camera but lately i rarely use it. since primary school, i used to like taking pictures, that i ended up taking more pictures of others. (well, as i was more confident in my picture-taking skill.) however, when the pictures were developed, i felt disappointed for not having many pictures of myself. :(

hurm~ i have now learned my lesson. as i prefer to be in the pictures, i always let my pictures taken using other people's camera. i'm amazed myself how i can be in so many pictures. (hahaha, yeah right!) aren't we grateful to have cameras in our life that memories can remain and be remembered even when we are old and grey? i was just looking back at some old pictures of mine and it was hard not to smile thinking of the good old days.

yeah, the days when i was so 'selebet' and ugh... sangat tak anggun... i don't feel like explaining, so i hope these pictures will do the explanation for me ;)

early days in standard six

a few days before i moved to kelantan

yeah, still the same day

form two (2001)

i must have thought i looked so nice and presentable at that time, but just look at those pictures!! hahaha.... must be the way i used my tudung. hurm, these are some other old pictures but i am glad to admit, i look much better here... =D

form 5 with my dear dorm mates

with G5 girls during aaj days~

sending oya off to aussie

small reunion with my ex-dorm mates before going to japan

and now for some recent photos... =)

ooops, wrong picture.. nih selebet la! next please~

visiting shera with mimi ^-^

in sydney with the future architects

so, what do u think? any changes since small? hahaha (saje letak gmbr nih, konon2 muke serious)

what women want. what women want to hear.

2009-06-23T21:19:00.003+09:00

the very moment people say something, what do they actually want to hear in return? what kind of reaction do they expect? for example,if you were to say something like this,

"i'm having a hard time at work"

what kind of reply do you really want to hear from other people? would you want to hear comforting words or would you rather get some solutions to your problem?

men and women are very different in the way of thinking. women naturally want to hear comforting words from their partner. they don't really need the solutions to the problem. all they want to have is someone who can listen to their problems and understand well how they feel.

however, on the other hand, men totally have a different idea. when they tell you something or share some problem, what they really want to hear is the solution. that is exactly the reason why men tend to tell directly to women what they think is right and rational to do, but sadly it only ends up with a fight. just don't be surprised with this kind of situation. (kesian gile...)

men always find it weird when they are told by women that they don't listen well when they thought they have done great enough. (not mentioning with the solutions they have given out.) oh no no no~ men out there, please, you don't have to crack your brains giving out opinions and stuff as what you need to do is nothing else but just to be there and comfort them with some soothing words.

what normally happens:-

w: i am so tired of work nowadays.
m: i think you have been working too hard. try take some holidays. you are entitled to do so, aren't you?
w: but i still have loads to do in the office. i can't just leave the office at times like this.
m: seek help from your colleagues. surely they can give you a hand.
w: they themselves have so many things to finish up.
m: seems like everyone is having a hard time then. get a cup of coffee in the office when you get the chance to do so. hehe
w: you're not listening to a word i say! (widens her eyes and walks away)
m: ...............................haven't i been listening?? (feels surprised and also walks away)

what women really want to hear:-

w: i am so tired of work nowadays.
m: really? any problem in the office lately?
w: i have deadlines to meet and a lot of presentations to do.
m: hurm, it sounds tiring. (gives a sympathetic look)
w: almost everyone is complaining about work these days. we even had to work on saturdays and sundays for the last two weeks.
m: seriously? it doesn't sound fair to the staff. all of you have already worked so hard on weekdays. but don't worry, i guess it won't be for long.
w: yeah, i really hope so.
m: well, you must be tired. since it is no longer office hour, let's get a cup of coffee and relax a bit.
w: sure, why not! thanks for listening anyway! =)

two similar situations, but very different results. well yeah, surely you might think women are a bit difficult to understand. but once you know how, and the right things to say, you might reduce the conflict in your relationship. good luck in trying~ =D

sometimes you just gotta laugh

2009-06-20T23:25:00.010+09:00

after 3 long weeks, at last, i managed to finish up one very good story book: the tenth gift, written by jane johnson. seriously speaking, i am really proud of myself for reading this particular mesmerizing book as it's not a chick lit novel but instead, an adventure story which is full of history. (a round of applause for afiqah... yey... thank u thank u!! )

ok,due to the addiction of reading, i found myself buying another new book yesterday. i tried to look for something as interesting as 'the tenth gift' but i ended up buying a chick lit novel. hahahah.... another marian keyes novel by the way. back to my old self i guess. ^-^

i find it really entertaining to have a book to fill up my time (duh~ as if i have so much time on my hands...). at times i enjoy reading serious books because they make my mind wonder about a lot of things which i don't even know. however, most of the time, i just love to read light and simple stories, especially the funny ones. i really admire witty writers who can make me laugh out loud. oh, pity my housemate. i hope she doesn't feel that miserable to share a house with a high pitched voice girl. (-_-;)>

hurm, actually there are a few things that really enlighten me. i can actually laugh so hard or at least smile by myself when i do these things:

when i online my facebook account and reply to every comment made at either the status, photos or walls of my friends. it can be very addictive since my friends, especially my high school friends are soOo attached to facebook lately. we keep on replying and chatting on everybody's wall. we also *ehem* purposely mark them as 'like' and comment at every pictures of ourselves to appear as highlight on other people's page... (sangat mancapab dan tak senonoh ok! T_T err isn't this supposed to be a secret? sshhh~)
when i read ranma comic books. man, they are so funny. i bought more than 10 series last month as the books were sold at very low prices. i have read them again and again and they never fail to make me laugh like i only read them for the first time. i wonder, am i considered as childish to still read comic books? hehehe... i really hope not!
whenever i read HANIS ZALIKHA's blog. seriously i suggest everyone who still doesn't know who she is, to check her blog out. she's damn funny and sincere in her writings. try clicking here for more info: http://www.inibelogsaya.blogspot.com/ she is one funny and creative girl who is surprisingly, 2 years younger than i am. oh well, nothing to be surprised actually. i just find it amazing how a young girl can capture the attention of so many people. cool huh?
everytime i watch the happyslip videos. you can just type happyslip at youtube or just click here: http://happyslip.com/ try it out! christine presents so many funny videos that from the first time i watched her videos, i couldn't help but love them all. she is one talented girl who can perform very well. she acts, sings and plays the piano and also guitar like a pro. oh, how i wish i could be more spontaneous like her. =)
after i get back from meeting the malaysians in kobe. there are more or less 25 people of malaysians here in kobe. we always meet up and do some activities together. whenever we have the opportunity to do so, there are always some gossips or stories to share that make me feel like laughing my heads off. like this afternoon, i had lunch with izyan, redza and dan. redza and izyan had an interesting debate whereby izyan blamed redza for not saying hi when they pass each other. and in defense, redza said he had always greeted her but he fails to get any response. so he told us that he greets izyan by raising his eyebrows. (-_-;) some effort~~~~~sigh
whenever i read my grateful lists. guess what, i don't have a diary, but i own a 'gratitude book'. it is filled by all the things that i am grateful for. the notebook is almost full now and everytime i read it, i will surely smile. it makes my day just to remember how lucky i am in so many ways. so, let's be grateful in everything!

yes, laugh is indeed the best medicine. laugh like these people folks! *wink* ;)

**oh, it's getting so hot lately. and it is not at all a laughing matter. sigh~ T_T **

best buddies~

2009-06-15T21:34:00.011+09:00

beep beep

i woke up from hearing a message tone . i looked at my phone: 1 message received. it was from my dad, telling me that they have arrived safely in london. =)
ayah mummy, have a great time there k! huhu, how i wish to be in london with everyone!

putting my phone down, i tried to imagine my family spending quality time together. waaaah!! already i feel so left out!! huhu, i will surely feel lonely these two weeks as i can't call them freely through phones. haih, and the thought of getting back to the real world after spending 4 beautiful days in gunma with my best buddies.

i am glad that i took some time off in the very middle of the semester. some people must think it as inappropriate. hehe, but why not? for the sake of rejuvenating. ;P

reasons why i love my true friends:

we can talk about anything under the sky
we share a lot of things together
we understand each other very well
we care about each other
i can be myself around them!!!!!!! (sangat senang hati)

oh i miss them so much!

(saat2 berlakon kesejukan.... erkss)

(usaha menolak mimi jatuh ke dalam sungai)

(semangat nak melawat sungai kiryuu)

(tuan rumah yang sangat semangat)

**hope to meet up again one day guys~ eh, silap... girls!**

do you believe in science? do you believe in religion?

2009-06-10T20:02:00.006+09:00

how do you react when your lecturer mentions your name in front of the class many times during the lecture? what kind of expression do you normally give? do you just smile or blush? hehe

so this morning my lecturer once again mentioned my name when explaining something. he normally started the class by giving some questions to the students as attendance. however today, out of the blue he asked something different.

do you believe in science? and, do you believe in religion? give reasons to your answer.

i was quite surprised for him to ask such question as we all know very well that majority of the japanese do not believe in religion. how did i answer to this question? hurm... it's a secret. heheh... as i had to write in japanese, i hope he could understand well what i tried to convey in the small paper.

anyway, after he collected the paper back, he said something about people and religion. as i have thought, he mentioned my name about being a muslim. he also mentioned about ramadan and how we all have to control ourself from eating. but~ he actually got the facts wrong when he said we have to fast for about 2 weeks?? and we have to be home during this period?? eh... bukan la sensei~! it should be a month. and it also doesn't matter where we are during ramadan, we can always fast anywhere. however, i did not want to embarrass him in front of everybody else that i just smiled. and half laughing actually. (dont get me wrong, i felt like laughing because ----> budak2 lab ramai minta nak balik malaysia time puasa dalam 2 minggu camtu sebab nak raya jugak. sebab tu kot? hahahah)

but i was also quite surprised that after the class, a lot of my friends had asked me about ramadan and how thay had known about our lecturer's mistake. so they know that we have to fast for one month. (rupenye dorang pun hampir tergelak time sensei cakap 2 minggu... so i wasn't the only one... ;P) oh, they also know that we have to fast till the sun goes down. wow! amazing huh? how they actually know about the facts though themselves do not have faith in any religion. kagum~~ =)

anyway, i hope one day i can really tell them about what islam is all about. at least i am happy that they do not hold any grudge or have any negative view against islam. alhamdulillah....

to be a girl or a boy?

2009-06-08T16:56:00.005+09:00

girl

7.15am-woke up and slowly took her shower
7.45am- was preparing to go to school.

blue. red. blue or red? hurm, green is much better. okay, then green it is for today! :)

she took out her favourite green blouse and ironed it. she has got everything planned in her head.

yeah, a white cardigan to go with this and also a pair or jeans. as for tudung? errm... a white one will do.

after ironing the blouse, she immediately put it on together with her white cardigan. done! she looked into the mirror, smiling as she felt satisfied with her looks. next, she looked for the white tudung.

it should be here. somewhere... ugh, where is it? oh oh...

she saw the tudung laying in the used basket together with other used clothes.

sigh~ erm, it's ok. a cream tudung can still do the trick. ....... damn! someone has borrowed it last week!!! how can i be so stupid to forget something like this!!!

looking at the clock, she realised that she was running out of time. class was about to start in half an hour's time. as fast as she could, she ran back to the wardrobe looking for other outfits. yeah, back to the drawing block. blue? red? blue or red??

5-10 minutes later- she only could take a glimpse into the mirror before running off to school.

boy

8.10am- woke up. took a shower.
8.30am-grabbed any shirt his eyes first laid on and yesterday's trousers and already set to go to school.

8.50am
as the class was about to start, the boy and girl arrived at the same time.

boy: looked ok
girl: looked red and blue. she wore a blue pair of shoes by mistake to go with her red dress. (please take note: gambar hanya hiasan. tiada kaitan ngan blog ini... ;) )

doesnt this sound familiar? girls need more time to prepare for something dont they? hahaha... just at times when time is running out, everything turns upside down. well anyway, i actually love the challenge. the decisions-making-challenge early in the morning ;P

oh, what shall i wear tomorrow for class.... hurmmm ^-^

small brat

2009-06-05T12:20:00.008+09:00

ooh yeah~ it feels really good when the entire house is spotless from any habuk2 n kesan degil. though it is very cloudy out there, i dont seem to be bothered. i had a great time cleaning up the house, washing my clothes and.... singing out loud like nobody's business with the speaker turned on full blast. hahaha, oops! so sorry dear neighbours. i am just in the mood for singing today. =)

when suddenly i realised something:

blog beta sudah lame tak bersentuh!!!! i havent touched this blog for quite sometime!!!

ooh! that is not a good sign. yeah, i have been doing more of reading and less writing lately. geez~
so, whats up? yesterday i went out looking for some presents for kak siha's cute children. coz tomorrow, guess what? there will be a birthday party for our dear numa~!! weee~~ really cant wait for tomorrow. but it was pretty hard for me to look for the presents as i am so inexperienced with little kids! i ended up not buying anything yesterday and hurm~ probably i'll be going out again this evening. better find something quick as i still have other things to prepare for tomorrow. (sssh, it's a secret: i'll be preparing a birthday cake for numa! hahaha... okay2, i shouldnt have taken the credit as i am only going to be a mere helper and the real chef is no other than izzat... hehehhe ;P)

talking about small children, how it reminds me of being a small brat back in school.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------>>
venue: skjdp melaka
year: 1995

the very 1st day in primary school, i had a big fight in the class with a friend of mine. well, you know how girls fight. i pulled her hair, and she pulled my tudung... (yes2, i wore tudung in class since standard 1... hahah, very cute eh?). to make things more interesting, everyone in the class including the boys cheered us on. it really felt like wrestling ok! since that day, the both of us got popular, or notorious should i say? but it was alright as we got along pretty well after the incident. not exactly as best friends, but more of a rival. yeah, in everything. funny though how small children can be so competitive.

hurm, we were like gangsters in the class that we actually bullied some other kids who were less brainy than us... huhu, sangat la kejam bila pikir2 balik. i dont intend to go into the details but as a result, the vice-headmaster himself came to my class(1 anggerik <--- i was still in standard one... baaah~ how stupid) and gave me a warning to stop bullying this particular poor child. or else, i will be expelled from the school...? whoa! that was harsh! i was only an innocent standard 1 girl... (^-^) *wink*

(my friend-rival here: siti suhailah jasmi!! we lost contact since she moved out from the school in standard 4. i f u happen to read this, huhu, buzz me!!! )
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

so that was some crucial part of my life. heheh, i dont think my parents knew about this. well, but it was just some history. i am now much cooler and more matured. pleaseee say yes and agree with me, people~! :D

ok sannomiya, wait for me!! i shall be hunting for some presents! yeah! semangat2! ^-^
oh shit! i forgot to take the clothes out from the washing machine... huwaaa... k, daa~

dear diary....

2009-05-26T19:54:00.006+09:00

does writing in a diary make you feel any better? i don't really know because i don't really write in diaries. i have tried many times but somehow i failed to continue because it just took so much time of my time. (so does this blog actually!)

i kept postponing my entries and sometimes i only wrote half way. well, maybe i am the expressive type that i tried to insert every single detail of what had happened without leaving out my emotions in the diary. and guess what, i just couldn't stand writing them anymore. my hand and fingers got numb only after 2 pages of writing. i can't help feeling regret with my laziness that half of my life might have been forgotten. well, bits and pieces of exciting times will surely remain but i am just scared i would lose something which i shouldn't have.

i put up a blog just to share some of my thoughts, some of my inner feelings, but it does not actually act as a diary. some people might have used blog as a daily diary, but i choose not to as it might just bore people to know about my daily boring life. :P

that is also the reason why i always share my day and my feelings of happiness, anger, frustration and loads more, with those whom i trust the most. i barely see the need to write because i find it easier to talk and once i have got the stories out of my head, i feel more at ease. actually i do have a notebook where i jot down the events that happen on some particular days. nothing much on my emotions though. i express better when i talk, i guess.

however these few days i feel like something is mounting up within me. i feel like sharing something with someone but i just couldn't reach that person. it is hard not to let something out when you really have to. some things are suitable to be shared only with the right people. haih....

so, people! what do you suggest? should i start writing in a diary again? does it really help people feel better? or perhaps you want to lend your ears to listen to my boring stories? =D

boredom

2009-05-24T14:30:00.005+09:00

it's dark outside. it was a bright sunny day this morning. funny how the clouds can move from one place to another that fast. while i was still enjoying the sun, the clouds had to spoil my mood. not a bad thing though. it actually lowers the temperature a little.

but since my mood can really depend on the weather,this kind of weather makes me feel tremendously low with no expectation. everything seems dull and no life. should i go back to bed?

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhh!!!

i really feel like shouting and throwing myself into the sea. floating on the water and looking at the sky. it would be a great way to relax a bit. boy, how i miss pulau perhentian. the crystal clear water with bright sky and glittering spotless beach. colourful fishes and big turtles in the sea.

this kind of weather always brings back a lot of memories. i don't want to be here! i am physically in kobe but spiritually in malaysia. haih.... what can i do. man, i'm bored!! ~_~

eyes cant lie

2009-05-22T23:23:00.004+09:00

everyone can laugh, everyone can smile.

but can everyone smile

sincerely from the bottom of the heart?

the mouth can lie, but eyes cant.

even if we try very hard

to make a curve on that lip

without sincerity,

somehow people can see through us.

thats just not what we really want to convey.

if we really r sincere,

just a small smile is enough.

our eyes will smile together

and also the people around.

(kalau hebat, teka la, yang mane satu tengah senyum)

so, dont worry. even if we r wearing a mask to protect ourselves from swine flu virus or whatsoever, people can still see our smile. not exactly on the lips, but at least from our eyes. not bad, huh.

smile more everyone! it makes you look younger! =D

money versus time

2009-05-19T14:15:00.004+09:00

is money really everything to us? is it true we cant enjoy life without money? i totally disagree with it though i am a big fan of money myself. ^o^

we are able to enjoy simple life even we have very little money with us. it all depends on how we define the word 'happy'. to me, it is very simple. as long as i have good company, family or even close friends, i am happy. yes, that simple.

people nowadays tend to have the idea of 'no money, no life'. yeah, it might be a little bit troublesome when we don't have enough money to buy something. however, money is not everything to create a good life but time is. as long as we still have the time and we make full use of it, no doubt we could have the best life we ever wished for.

to us students, it is most challenging on weekends and holidays to make use of the time. the rate of money spending is the highest on holidays. almost everyone wants to go out and plans like that normally require a lot of money, such as going out-station, going to concerts, shopping and also having big meals outside with friends.

here i would list out some activities which i find very interesting yet not much money needed. all you need is company.

take a stroll with your friends at nearby park.
make pot-luck picnic with your close friends near the river or anywhere nice.
invite your friends over to your house and cook together. it is the time when you can talk everything and update about yourselves.
make your own concert at home with your colleagues.
rent some DVDs and watch them at home.
go under the sun and play Frisbees.
go to the playground and play with the swings. would be more fun if you take videos of yourselves.
if you are not far from the beach, just sitting by the beach would be great. enjoy the sunset and relax. =)

these things can be more interesting compared to having expensive dinner at exclusive restaurants or even buying expensive stuff at the malls. so, why spend more? =)

i dont need holidays!!!

2009-05-17T10:43:00.005+09:00

due to the fact that one person was confirmed having the swine flu in kobe, our university is closed for 1 week. i heard that later that night, this disease has spread to more than 5 people. pretty scary but i hate to have instant holidays!

do you know why? the reason is that, after lazying for about a week like this, we will surely be pushed and will be given a hard time later on. this situation has once happened 2 years ago when someone from our university was suspected getting measles and because of that, the whole school was closed. at first, we were so excited to get the holidays. but after the school started to reopen, we had to attend saturday classes to replace the classes that we have missed before. it was really tiring and i hate the fact that i only have 1 day of holiday per week. things can get even worse because there is a chance of our examinations and summer holidays getting rescheduled. that 1 thing worries me the most.

i have just booked a ticket back home on 7th of august!!!! i dont want to delay my flight and it would cost me a lot just to change the date... huuuuu~~ people, help me to calm down when those days come, ok?! right now, the only thing i can be happy about, is my mid term exam will be postponed till school reopens. hahahha....

hurmmmm.... what should i do for today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, so on and so forth....

feel like selling some fish? oh, u wish!

2009-05-14T17:46:00.010+09:00

mr A : god, im hungry. lets have some bread, shall we?

miss B: yeah, me too! my stomach is growling. bread sounds good to me.

miss C: oh, that's a great idea! lets go to the coffee shop near the post office and have some bite.

mr D : i cant wait to have my favourite mozzarella and tomato croissant. what do you say, X?

mr X :no can do. i am not hungry. i feel like going to the gym and get a good workout. i am sure everyone understands. we need to be there pronto. it closes in 2 hours' time. plus, i am the driver now. u can always go to the coffee shop some other time.

so what do call a person like mr X? yes, exactly! he is no other than a selfish person. just because he doesnt want to have what other people want, it doesnt mean he can deprive other people's cravings. even if he were to have the thing that people need. (in the above case, he has the car). why does everyone else have to give up their plans?

it drives me up to the wall when someone can be really heartless and selfish. all he ever care is his own needs without considering other people's feelings. i am a great believer that older people should be wiser and more considerate. but i guess i am wrong as older people can be totally ignorant at times. anyway, majority should win hands down, shouldnt they? =)

mummy, happy mother's day

2009-05-10T14:49:00.005+09:00

when i was just a little girl, i asked my mother what would i be.

would i be pretty, would i be rich, here's what she said to me:

my dear iqa, you are already pretty, and you can always get married to a rich man.

hahahha, ok, that is fiction. my mother would never say something like that. but the pretty part, maybe! =D

as everyone knows, it is mother's day today. i am frustrated not to get the opportunity to be there with my mom. and of course, not to be there with my father on his birthday 2 days ago. anyway, mummy... you are the greatest mother anyone could ever wished for. you have been there for me whenever i need somebody to support me. you are my life and i cant imagine living without you. i miss you so much!!!!! HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MAMA! muah2!!

happy birthday ayah!!

2009-05-08T23:57:00.006+09:00

satu, kasih nan abadi,

tiada tandingi,dia yang satu.

dua,sayang berpanjangan,

membawa ke syurga,kasihnya ibu.

tiga,lapar dan dahaga,

rela berpayahan,setianya ayah.

empat, sukarku ketemu,

berhati selalu,beza antara kasih dan kekasih.

ibu,ku ingat dahulu,

menyisir rambutku,kemas selalu.

ayah, membawa ke sekolah,

bergunalah ilmu,hingga dewasa.

sayang,dengar lagu ini,

untuk kau sandarkan,buat pedoman.

manis,jangan teus ditelan,

pahit terus dibuang,

itu bidalan harus kau renungkan.

this song reminds me of school days where we learned it during usrah and it is still fresh in my memory. whenever i sing this song, i will definitely think of my father and mother and it never fails to get me a lump in my throat. yeah, i miss them so much. and today, the 8th of may, is my father's birthday. to ayah, i hope u had a great time on your birthday and may all ur wishes come true. your daughter misses you so much!

i love you dad! muah2! =)

crawling in my shawl

2009-05-06T18:48:00.005+09:00

heeeeeeeelpppppppppppppp~

it was really traumatising. i still got goosebumps because of this disgusting hundred-feet-animal. ugh... yeah, i just saw a centipede in my laundry.(lipaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!) i was just about to fold my clean, washed clothes when i saw a 6 to 7 centimetres long centipede. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppp!!! it was so gross!!

i got so freaked out that i jumped and shrieked out. luckily my housemate wasn't home and also unlucky for me as i had no one to help out.

with hands half shaking, i took the shawl where the centipede was crawling on and hurriedly i tossed it out of the window. oh, not to worry, actually i threw it outside, where i hang and dry my clothes. (still not that stupid to throw a good and nice shawl away.)

okay, i was totally horrified by the sight of the centipede. it sure can crawl fast enough.

feel like vomiting. shall have no appetite for the rest of the day.

feel sick. gonna hate crawling creatures for the rest of my life.

hopeless

2009-05-02T01:20:00.003+09:00

i feel hopeless. more like useless actually, for not being able to help someone who is important while he/she is in trouble. having a good time while someone is having a hard time doesnt at all make me feel good.

somehow i hope i can do more than just giving words of wisdom as if im a miss-know-it-all. it does make me feel sick. coz i know im no miss perfect afterall.

true, that sometimes all we need is someone who can listen to our problems. but how far am i as a good listener? how supportive can i be when someone ever needs one? is my shoulder good enough for someone to cry on?

i really wish i could do more than just being there for those who are in need.

*sigh*

a better person, a better tomorrow

2009-04-29T20:53:00.006+09:00

at last, i got the opportunity to shop alone. not that i hate going out with anybody. it is soOo far from the truth. hey, someone even says im a social buttefly. (hahahahha! that's funny!) but somehow i think i just need time for myself. going in and out the shops without feeling guilty that other people are waiting, and for a much better reason, i just dont need to wait for other people too =D

being anywhere i want at my own pace, that is what i like the most. i come to realise that i end up buying more stuff when i go out alone. and also, i dont do any shoppings if i go out with boys.

the reason is simple. i know how much boys do not like shopping and plus, i, myself really dont feel comfortable testing clothes on or even looking at stuff when they are around. well, boys can be very outspoken with their comments that it can really kill my spirit to continue shopping. T_T

well,it is not easy to find a soulmate who makes me feel comfortable to be with. till now, i still think that my family members are the best. they know me well and can give honest opinions without hurting my feelings =)

hurm, maybe i am a bit choosy on picking company. but somehow, i dont really think so. there are no actual rules on behaving when we go out with other people. it's just common sense though. yeah, i guess i might list down the things that might offend other people during an outing.

1) listening to ipods or mp3 players when there are only the 2 of u.

-hey, come on. dont be ridiculous. it is only right to have proper conversation. it is also rude to have your earphones plucked in your ears when someone is talking.

2) looking away when somebody is saying something.

-it shows how uninterested you are with your friends' story. even if you are, can't you at least play along just to make your friend feel a lot better? and of course, you yourself need to watch your friends' face when talking. if not, your friend can suspect you talking to the wall. not their fault if they think so.

3) not addressing your friend's name.

-this is the most common fault people do. doesn't it make you feel more important when people can address ur name well? it shows that they have some effort to know your name and how they care about you. it makes a lot of difference. trust me.

4) not using these 3 simple words - thanks, sorry, please - often enough.

-this is what people nowadays are lacking. manners. i'm really sorry to actually say this. am i wrong when i say that we have learned these really simple but meaningful words since small? but from the looks of it, people are very very difficult to say 'thanks' after getting something, 'sorry' after making some faults and last but not least, 'please' when asking a favour. please try saying these words everyday in your life. it can really make you a much better person.

well, actually i have lots more to put, but im afraid it will bore everyone to death. 4 is enough i guess. anyway, all da best in being a better person ok! of course, this is a reminder for me too.

blessings in disguise

2009-04-27T22:29:00.004+09:00

heard a couple of great news concerning my friends. also heard a heart-breaking story from a really close friend. really happy for the former and cant help feeling so sad for the latter.

we can always plan but HE is the one who determines everything. if we dont get what we want now, me may get it a lil bit later. and sometimes, it also means, its not even suitable for us. Allah knows best. keep telling ourselves that there are always blessings in disguise.

no doubt we need colours in our life. sometimes everything is beautiful n colourful and sometimes everything is dark n turns black. and if that ever happens, just remember that black is also a mixture of colours. =)

p/s: cant get this song out of my head:- i cant stop loving you by whiskey falls. *wink*

things to do on a rainy day

2009-04-25T10:58:00.006+09:00

a raining saturday is the last thing i ever wanted. and yet, it happens today. i have known about this since monday but i still hoped that the weather forecast might be wrong. stupid me, the weather forecast in japan has always been accurate so far. (sigh)

and now, everyone is practically stuck at home, probably doing reports. a good thing i suppose, but it is so not like saturday~!! huwaaa... my housemate has left the house early morning to attend her dancing practice. i hate being at home alone doing nothing. (weyh, belajar la afiqah! ...eeeppp~!)

what are the things u might consider fun on lifeless days like this? ideas needed here!! hurm, is making crank calls considered fun? i might just try it once. (sape nak kena angkat tangan!!! ;P)

okay, let me just list down some ideas on what u can do on a rainy day.

1) clean the house (boleh training jadi suri rumah bejaya)

2) ring the bell of every house in the apartment (sumpah kene campak kluar dari apartment lepas tuh)

3) cook something special n give them to your neighbours (opologise for ringing their bells earlier)

4) rearrange furniture in your room (kate takde keje kan)

5) try on all of your clothes in your wardrobe. mix n match everything. if u are a camwhore, dont hesitate to capture your own picture n upload it in facebook of flickr account (mesti korang slalu buat kan? )

6) play with your dolls (kembalikan memori kanak2 anda)

7) turn on raya songs and sing at the top of your lungs (slalu jugak buat time2 rindu malaysia)

8) continue sleeping (okay, i know... so not productive)

9) call your loved ones n tell them how much u miss them (sounds decent)

yeah, i am actually just killing time doing this blog. hahaha.... and the thing i might want to do is no 9. yeah, i am calling my parents now. u should do it too.

till then! adios amigo! ^_^

what blood type are you?

2009-04-23T20:58:00.007+09:00

i am still in the mood for novels. currently reading 'thanks for the memories' by Cecilia Ahern. it is basically about a man who donated his blood and to spice things up, the woman who received his blood actually got his memories. she could remember faces she had never seen, she could speak Latin, French and Italian without even learning them and so many other indescribable things happened right after she survived a terrible accident. spooky~ huh! the story line is great and undoubtedly makes me want to keep on reading. bravo to the brilliant writer! 5 star from me to you! clap clap clap =) (does anyone even care? lol!)

and IF this kind of stuff could really happen, whose blood would u want to receive from? a total stranger wont be quite promising though. can i get it from my lecturers? i really would love to score my exams with their knowledge. but i am sure their lives are not so interesting. and i bet the familiar faces i could ever remember would be the faces of other lecturers. yawn! how boring~ hahahaha...

i have once asked my friend and he replied it would be great to get it from his own best friend. it would be easier to know what his friend thinks of and there would never be any misunderstanding between them. that is one way of looking at things. would be interesting. especially if we have forgotten something, the memories gained from the blood donor which is our best friend would really help!

hahhaha.... here i am talking crap. somebody! kick me to reality please. =D

talking about blood, the japanese believe that each type of blood has a personality profile. it is kinda funny because they have a tendency to group people depending on the blood type. i feel especially sorry to the AB group. to the japanese, AB is considered the worst blood type. i am relieved though that i am from the O group and is considered the best type in japan. hahahhaha... (ok, again, i feel so lame if i were to believe at this crap. T_T)

for more info, u can click here : http://www.issendai.com/rpgs/takemywings/bloodtypes.htm

p/s: one of these days, i might consider donating some blood. what do u say? oh, i hope i wont get freaked out by the needles.

home sweet home.... (no matter how small it is!)

2009-04-21T20:38:00.008+09:00

my house here in kobe is small. two rooms, 1 small kitchen, a dining together with the living, 1 small bathroom and 1 toilet. nothing more. nothing less. n the windows are made of wood. so antique. ayah and mami said my house is just like a doll house. hahaha, yeah.... so true. even the ceilings are low.

(the picture says it all. the kitchen is so small. only one person at a time, ok! ;P)

when it gets windy, every little thing in my house vibrates so hard. oh, i might have exaggerated a little there. my windows and doors shake and produce very uncomfortable sounds. just imagine at night with no lights on.... hahaha, kinda scary but im already used to it. but i really hope it could stop. yesterday's wind was so strong and it had been raining since morning. the weather really killed my mood.

with no mood to do anything, i decided to pick up the phone and called my parents. falling asleep would be a bad idea since i had to get ready for my experiment today. i made a good decision on that! after an hour of borak2 kosong with ayah mami, i got my mood back. yippee~ but the wind was still having a good time hitting my windows. sigh! but i guess we cant get everything our way. so i continued with my revision. (bising la tingkap nih dentam dentum)

today, once again, my partner and i managed to finish up everything very early. (so~ happy!! ^_^) i also took a picture of our experiment. 'playing' with the wires was so much fun. kesimpulannya, jadi la electrical engineer. =D

married girl is not married, yet..

2009-04-20T20:12:00.007+09:00

Hi married girl, how r u ?which batch were u in smss?Wat r u doing rite now?

so this is the message i got from a senior who added me as a friend in facebook. to tell the truth, i really have no idea who he is. guess what? he is actually 20 years older than i am. hebat! means he is a super super senior to me. lol! what attracks me is the word 'married girl'. hahaha, yeah, i actually put my status as married in facebook. kinda interesting and it is so not gonna happen for girls around my age to be married. and so, i thought! but look, just how wrong can i be! not only girls at this age could be married, but even boys could! T_T

unbelievable~~~ i chatted with my friend this evening and got soOo shock to get to know that one of my friends will get married soon! like, this summer? whoaAA~ who could have guessed? and he might get married here in japan. (oops, kantoi insan ini lelaki)....

like what my friend has just said, kalau dah sampai seru, kahwin jugak...
ohoho, this kind of statement can really really make someone think. bile seru itu? hahaha... but ayah and mami, dont worry, i am still your cute little daughter. innocent and still have loOong way to go! :D (please ignore my status in facebook ok!)

me, looking very innocent and happy. i can really smile from cheek to cheek. hahaha

looking at old photos really makes me feel old. not old enough to be married though. *wink*

love notes.... ;P

2009-04-18T11:05:00.000+09:00

ohayou! ^_^ it's saturday morning people! better get moving for the daily chores....

it is a bright saturday morning, good weather to go out for a jog. well yeah, kind of.
however, all that im doing is waiting for the baticrom's man to deliver our food stock that could probably last only for a month. (sigh~)... and yet, still no plans for this weekend. i have actually planned with our seniors to go down to rokkomichi and get some massage... aaah~ it would be relaxing............(just the thought of it has made me more relaxed... ;P)

so yesterday, after got betrayed by the height-measuring machine(it made me shorter by 0.6cm! damn! i got all sulky because of it) we went to kaikan to play ping pong. it has been quite some time for us to play together. got back my smiles after managed a few hits. hahahaa... it feels good to move your body around! =)

as usual, after ping pong, we had dinner around kaikan. went to saizer with ina, dan and redza. we shared a few laughs together listening to the stories everyone had to deliver. really had a good time talking that we didnt realise how much time we had spent there. at one point, we talked about girls who have been ignored by boys whom they approach. hahahaha! and guess what, redza said, he had been one of those boys without him realising it! yeah right. and the story goes like this:-----

the girl in his school has put a *love letter/note* inside his bag, hoping for something to happen between them. i suppose! hahaha... but well, as we know, boys' bags are not exactly the cleanest or well-managed place to put 'something really important' in. hurm, im guessing u all know the outcome of it right? yeah, he didnt realise the letter till the next 2 years. and 2 years later, he actually wondered what is this black n dirty paper doing in his bag, and when he opened it... tadaaa.... the girl was actually waiting for his reply the next day. she was hoping him to put a reply under her desk or something like that. hahahahha, n of course, it didnt happen. at all! because of that, he had some reputation during his school days. pity the girl, but pity my junior here so much more. T_T hahahah

ok, in a nutshell...... attention to all girls out there! who might want some attention by some boys.. pleaseeee remember! not to accidentally or purposely drop a love note in boys' bags. so not helping the situation.
hardeeharhar! :-))

till then!(oh, my food stock just arrived a few moments ago. hooray! )

happy tunes in my head

2009-04-17T10:54:00.000+09:00

ooo yeah, i better start blogging again. hurm, these past weeks i have been busy reading loads n loads of story books. and most of them are chick lit novels. hehehe... yeah, so lame n yet so me ^_^

i am so glad that 2 years have passed that it makes only a total of 2 years left for me to be in japan! yey! ops, should i be happy about this? i know, a lot of people might be so sad to leave this country but, for me, i am just too excited to get back home. to be in malaysia and to be where my heart has always been. in sungai buloh with ayah and mami of course! :D

hurm, 3rd year has been nice so far! my 1st experiment went well as i got a very cool partner. heheh, we did great as a pair i might say. though it was a lil bit confusing to connect the wires,(oh, before i forget we did an experiment on digital circuit.... loved it so much)but we actually did it and finished it up quite early. (all smiles that day... hahahah).

and today, friday the 17th(doesnt mean anything here does it?), is a holiday for me. for what? ahah, actually, every friday will be a holiday for me. i chose not to register the class on fridays. (macam la byk sangat credit hours... erm, boleh ar tahan cukup makan... happy~~~). so, 3 days of holiday for the rest of my zenki!!!

hip hip hooray! :)

it makes me wonder......

2009-03-18T08:49:00.000+09:00

i wonder...
why do people keep giving promises
when they know they just cant keep them
or perhaps to show some effort
to make them really happen

i even wonder...
why people might easily say
that they will always be there for u
when they are nowhere to be found
during the most needy hour

have u ever wondered...
why people even bother to show they care
when the very next day they can totally abandon u
and why
oh why do people always talk about feelings
when they themselves can appear very heartless at times

i have always wondered...
why people need to talk about long-lasting friendship
when even a short relationship is so damn hard to achieve
and why do we bother to blame other people
when we ourselves are full of flaws

doesnt it make u wonder...
how lord is great
that we are given brains
to go hand in hand with the heart
though the heart might bleed
but the brain can tell it to stop and just be strong

- AfIqAh^^AiSyAh -

Road to happiness.

Respect others first if you want to gain respect

Tata 2011~

a tale of a girl

that's just awkward~~

I want!!!!

Journey to the west.

say no to self pity

i have my parents by my side

where can i find such place?

Ramblings

unconditional love

Gambare Nippon!

presents!!! i love you!!!

of holidays, final year project and chinese new year wish! =)

what now? vlogging maybe? =P

22-2-2

@lab

GREAT excuses to be excused

2007 to 2011

KY: kuuki yomenai

the prize for being positive ^^

just call my name and you'll make my day =)

this is my fairy tale

higher!! higher!!

*sneeze sneeze* *cough cough*

deal with them with patience

how about a change in lifestyle?

when tomorrow never comes

bye bye summer, helloOo autumn!

when you feel down

::I MISS YOU::

PM to Actress to Engineer =)

have i mentioned that i love my labmates?

zap me back to reality

fifa world cup 2010

from the bottom of my heart

wedding videos!!! =)

oops i did it again

it's all about the money~

the ones i love =)

reporting from hong kong

how do you like your winter?

hello and goodbye

a big THANK YOU to you.... yeah, YOU!

lets not be too secretive shall we? ;)

aku-kau versus kita-awak

31st october =)

weird dream

my sister is officially engaged! weheww~

raya can also be tiring =D

imagine if you could meet your younger self...

express your love

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

attention seeker

good things come to an end

salam mubarak

padang & bukittinggi trip

that was close

home sweet home

I am a cheapskate

you know it's hot when.....

another month of patience

life is what you make it

camera and i

what women want. what women want to hear.

sometimes you just gotta laugh

best buddies~

do you believe in science? do you believe in religion?

to be a girl or a boy?

small brat

dear diary....

boredom

eyes cant lie

money versus time

i dont need holidays!!!

feel like selling some fish? oh, u wish!

mummy, happy mother's day

happy birthday ayah!!

sneeze sneeze cough cough